


A Trial Basis, At Least

by hydrabells



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Allen tried his best, Cracky af, Don't drink and gamble, F/M, M/M, Multi, The Noahs just really want you to join their emo band
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-21
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2018-07-16 10:23:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 31,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7264093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hydrabells/pseuds/hydrabells
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Allen leaves the Black Order, the Noah are very persistent in trying to convince him to settle down with the family.  And by the family, they mean their family.  Maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If You Can't Avoid Them...

Allen couldn’t help but wonder if it would be worthwhile to take out a restraining order on the Noahs at this point.  The Earl and him seemed to be joined on some cosmic level to continually run into one another (something he very irritably blamed on Neah every time it happened, to which the 14th typically responded with enthusiastic shouts for the Earl’s blood).  Tyki Mikk had an uncanny ability to predict his whereabouts, and enjoyed walking through walls, dropping out of ceilings and hopping through floors to catch him unawares.  On nights that he didn’t catch a glimpse of Road in his dreams, he assumed it was because she didn’t want to be seen (and, for the most part, the assumption was correct).  Wiseley didn’t follow him, but Tyki had once mentioned that the only reason was because Wiseley could see him through the demon eye regardless, which was less than reassuring.  Lulu Bell could theoretically be anywhere in any form, something he’d learned painfully after the first adorable kitten had hopped up onto his shoulder, leaned into (he assumed) sniff at his ear, and whispered in a disturbingly sensual manner that

_“The Earl would like to see you now.”_

He hadn’t been able to trust any sort of cute animal, or even un cute animals, since.

He’d seen Jasdero and Devito as well, but they were loud enough and easily distracted, so he usually managed to escape the area before they caught up to him.  Still, Allen was stressed, constantly.  Whether it was Cross’ influence (something he would deny until his death) or some other weakness, Allen finally cracked.  At the market, he picked up a bottle of red and went home, using every counter-surveillance trick he’d been forced to pick up over the past few months and almost running into the Earl while the bastard looked at wool, of all things, in a nearby shop.  Dodging that disaster, he made it home and, if refusing to outright admit that he was changing his tactics, refrained from doing a complete check of the perimeter and instead slipped off his coat and kindled a small fire in the threadbare apartment.  There was a single, moth eaten couch, and it was upon that that he sat, warming his hands by the fire and eyeing the bottle.  The fireplace popped particularly loudly, and Allen almost squealed.

_Get a hold of yourself, idiot disciple_

Ah, Cross’s voice reprimanding him in his own head.  Allen almost wept at the thought.  He swore he heard Neah laughing at him, then dismissed the thought as paranoia.  Not that that had anything to do with why the bottle was now in his lap, cork removed.  He sniffed it experimentally, not that he knew anything about wine.  Cross had been fond of anything containing alcohol, not limited to at one particular time, hooch brewed in the exercise of a prison yard.  That being said, if he was in the rare position of having leverage over someone else, he favoured some ridiculously expensive brand from Moldova.  Allen had made certain that his wine was not from the same country.  A moment of clarity hit, and he lit the lanterns in both the kitchen and his bedroom before settling down with an old blanket in front of the fire and taking his first sip of the wine.

* * *

 

_3 or so hours later_

* * *

 

Allen found that the wine provided a pleasant warmth in his stomach and had the excellent side-effect of drowning out the 14th entirely.  Furthermore, he felt more relaxed than he had since the first time Road had appeared in his dreams.  Although he’d counted the taste as unpleasant when he began the bottle, at halfway through he’d come to enjoy it.  _Perhaps this is what Cross meant when he described it as an acquired taste?_   A bright idea hit, and soon Allen was lounging in front of the fire, singing along faintly to the ratty gramophone that had been thoughtfully left by his landlady.  He wasn’t sure what the words were, or if there even were words, but the music was nice enough.  At that moment, he felt that he could have gotten a complete night’s sleep, or at least relaxed enough to play the piano or think of a new routine.

Unfortunately for Allen, who had long since forgotten the vague motivation for getting the wine and putting himself in an approachable and somewhat inviting position, the rest of the world continued to function as normal.  In that manner, Allen would have been the only one to be surprised when Tyki Mikk dropped from the ceiling and landed with a disturbingly practiced ease at the end of the couch.  At that point, Allen normally would have immediately activated crown clown, thrown him as far away as possible and immediately run to the next country over, but that approach had been proven time and time again to be less than permanent.  Allen composed himself and prepared to begin some serious negotiation, only for Tyki to frown and stand over him.

“What are you drinking, boy?  Not that cursed stuff from _França_ , I hope…” Tyki glared at the bottle as Allen shrugged in uncertainty.  Tyki muttered something unpleasant and tugged the bottle out of his arms, Allen’s stomach lurching at the feeling of the bottle and Tyki’s arm passing through his body. 

“ _Espanhol_ , huh?  This stuff is no good, boy.  Wine like this is weak, like water.  Where are the other bottles?” Tyki seemed oddly interested in that last question, Allen noted, considering he had just called the stuff poor.

“Don’t have any, you bastard.  Give that back, anyway.”  Allen glared, somewhat unconvincingly.

Tyki laughed at him, and then smirked.

“If you want it back, gamble on it!  Luckily for you, I have another bottle of proper _Português_ red nearby, as well as a deck of cards.  The winner can have both.  Deal, boy?  Tyki eyed him appraisingly.  Allen bristled.  That was the look that he gave suckers when he was working off Cross’ debts. 

“If you want to lose your wine so badly, get it.”  Allen oozed confidence.  Tyki smirked and tossed the bottle into the air, catching it again as he walked cheerfully through the walls and waved goodbye.  Allen didn’t know it, but the Noah of Pleasure would be reported throughout the town busybodies as “some lunatic sprinting across the rooves of the city with two bottles of alcohol” for the next week.

In fact, Allen had barely scavenged a loaf of bread and cheese before Tyki had returned, ponytail looking somewhat dishevelled and eyes oddly bright.  Allen grinned and immediately swayed, letting his words slur and his expressions exaggerate. 

“Mmm…Tyki!  Yer back!” He exclaimed, eyes too wide and mouth slack.

“Ahh…boy, do you have some other bottle here that I don’t know about?” Tyki stepped closer, only for Allen to fall against his chest.

“No!  Yeh took it, ya bastard!  Where’re the cards?” Tyki blinked and inhaled through his nose.  He could smell alcohol on the boy, but not the reek he’d expect with behaviour like this.  Still, he had a small frame and was young, so perhaps it was possible.

“Right here… Perhaps I should get you some water first?” Tyki offered, weakly.

“No!  I want to beat you, now!”  And with that proclamation, the two sat down in front of the fire, Tyki analysing Allen’s movements with the eyes of a predator.  It was when he passed Allen the cards to let the boy shuffle that he smirked, sitting back and relaxing.  Allen glared at him, boorishly and in perfect imitation of drunken haziness.  Tyki held out his hand, and Allen dealt cards with a practiced precision and finesse.  Tyki immediately beat him in the first hand.

“Did you think I would underestimate you with a poor performance like that, boy?  Stick to clowning, not acting.” Tyki laughed as Allen let the mask fall and rocked back, blatantly angry.  “How did you know?  I did a perfect imitation!” He demanded.

“You shuffle and deal too well for a drunk, and the smell wasn’t strong enough…neither was the wine, I’d expect.  You may be affected, but not enough for me to be fooled.”  Tyki grinned and took the bottle of Spanish wine, opening the window and immediately hurling it over the rooftops.  Allen blinked as an uncanny memory of himself doing the same to Cross surfaced.  Quickly repressing his Cross-related trauma, Allen stood.

“One hand isn’t enough.  Don’t think you can beat me over a complete game.”  Allen said, somewhat churlishly.

“An interesting proposition, but you have nothing to bet with.”  Tyki smiled condescendingly and flipped his bottle in his hand, catching it with arrogant aplomb.

“I have my clothing, still.  If I strip you first, then I win.  Deal?”  Allen smiled, beaming with innocence.  It was the grin he always used on suckers.  Tyki looked mildly disturbed by it.  Good.

“And if I strip you first…then you will have to reconsider your position on our family.” Tyki said the last bit quickly, not looking forward to Allen rejecting them once more.

It was to his surprise that Allen, with an oddly young and vulnerable look in his eyes, said yes.

The two played well, Allen unable to cheat without Timcampy and Tyki unable to cheat without his group.  Both were unused to playing honestly, and found themselves shirtless and cold before long.  At some point, Tyki opened the port he’d brought (with a lecture of port’s superiority to wine, and thus the generalised superiority of the Portuguese people over the French) and the two took sips from the bottle to stay warm.  Allen, unused to port, soon felt the alcohol’s effects and lost his pants, only to hit a lucky streak and force Tyki down to his underwear, much to the Noah’s displeasure.  Tyki, luckily enough, considered himself more of an adrenaline performer anyway and had Allen in the same state within two more hands.

It was the final hand that would have decided it.  Allen successfully bluffed him and won, immediately proclaiming victory.  Tyki glared, but revealed his final trick as he reached back and untied the leather strip that he used to keep his hair back, tossing it into the pile of clothes.  Allen blinked

“You can’t be serious.  That’s not clothing.  It’s a piece of leather.”

“It _is_ clothing, as much as your tie was considered clothing.  I don’t _like_ this either” He muttered, gesturing at his loose hair in annoyance “but it is undeniably clothing, _fedelho_.”

Allen glared, but was unable to argue.  His annoyance at having his win snatched away was triumphed only when Tyki revealed a pair of aces in the next hand, while Allen was stuck with a two and a seven. 

“Bastard.” He muttered, conceding the loss.

“ _Sim_.  _Passe-me_ , ah, that is, pass me the bottle, boy.”  Allen glared, letting the expression soften to a bizarre companionability as he passed Tyki the bottle, which was immediately finished.  Perhaps it was because they were both drunk, but they found themselves both lying in front of the fire, bickering and talking as the alcohol kept them warm.  Tyki’s English grew progressively poorer, Allen learned, as he drank.  Drowsily, he made a note to ask what language he kept slipping back into before standing.  Both men were still in their underwear, and neither could walk completely straight.  One thing led to another, and out of sheer exhaustion the two fell onto Allen’s bed, scarcely managing to pull the covers up before sleep took over.

The alcohol was enough to block Road from their dreams, but Wiseley’s face almost combusted when he checked in on Allen later that night, only to get an eyeful of his adoptive uncle’s head on the enemy’s chest, hair tangled in said enemy’s hand and legs far too close under the covers as the two revelled in unconscious bliss.

 


	2. A Deal's A Deal

Considering he hadn’t slept so well since he left the Black Order, Allen woke up feeling distinctly unpleasant.  For a moment, he almost understood Cross’ tendency to be in a poor mood throughout most mornings.  Then he caught himself empathising with Cross, and immediately turned his mind to other things.  Things such as the lovely mane of black hair that was currently resting on his chest.  Still half-asleep, Allen stroked the hair and sighed happily, gently turning the person’s head to face him for a good morning kiss.

It was only after his lips had brushed against the man’s that he processed the stigmata lining the forehead, only partially concealed by hair, and the memories of the previous night flooded back.  Unfortunately, at that point Tyki had more or less returned to consciousness and had apparently made the same mistake he had.  Allen felt his head being tugged closer as the Noah kissed him, too surprised and embarrassed to pull away as Tyki’s tongue brushed his lips.  At that point, Allen managed to get a hold of himself and gently pulled away.  Tyki’s eyes opened, slowly, and then suddenly Tyki had half fallen through the bed, only his right ear and shoulder protruding.

A muffled shout of something rose up through the mattress as Tyki composed himself and climbed back out of it.

“Ah…” Allen blinked as Tyki tugged himself ungracefully back onto the bed, the Noah’s cheeks a darker shade than normal.  Straw from the mattress was caught in his hair.  Allen blamed leftover effects of the alcohol, because he was bizarrely turned on by that.  The two stared at each other for a brief moment, and Allen was struck by the desire to _not say a word_ reflected in both of their eyes. 

“I…We didn’t…?”  The question was unspoken, but Allen shook his head definitively. 

“Ah.  Shame, boy, my title is not for nothing.  Some other time, now that you are part of the family!”  Tyki’s confidence restored, he laughed, if somewhat shakily.  Allen blinked again.

_Part of the family…?  Wait.  Shit._

The rest of the night returned to him, Allen felt his own face go pale.  Tyki looked at him with concern.

“Boy…If you feel uncomfortable, I did not mean…that is, only if we were both willing…what I mean to say… “Tyki fidgeted uncomfortably as Allen felt colour return to his cheeks once more.

“Ah!  No, shit, sorry I had forgotten about the bet.  Um.  About which, we never stipulated when exactly, and I have a few engagements in this town to take care of, so perhaps a rain check…?”  Allen choked out a nervous laugh, trying to ignore the fact that both of them were in their underwear and wow, he sure had done a number on that gorgeous, muscular torso- or rather, Tyki Mikk, enemy Noah, had certainly been effectively dealt with in the line of duty.  Excellent swordsmanship had no doubt been the cause of that scar, right?  Definitely.

“Boy.  As I was saying, the winner always decides on the time, and the time is now.  Road will no doubt prepare a door for us at any moment, so prepare yourself!” Tyki smiled in a manner that was no doubt meant to be winning.  Allen grimaced, and rolled out of bed.  If Tyki’s eyes settled on the boy’s muscular shoulders, back and ass, it was only the gaze of a warrior sizing up his opponent, or at least that was what he told himself while Joido screamed something incomprehensible about removing Allen’s liver.

Practicing a brief exercise in stress management, Tyki carefully focused on counting down from ten before standing and clothing himself once more.  Allen was engaged in the bathroom, so he wandered out to the kitchen and for lack of anything else to do, began frying eggs and wondering when Wiseley would bother to check up on them and get Road to open the damn door.

In fact, Wiseley was still mildly traumatised by the scene he had witnessed _last time_ he bothered to check on his adoptive uncle, and it was Lulu who first found Jasdero and Devit, who then relayed the good news to Fiidora who then passed it on to Sheryl, who immediately found Road and delicately requested a door be opened as soon as possible, thoughts of his dear, sweet brother being corrupted first and foremost in his mind.  By the time Road had opened the door, Allen and Tyki had long since sat down for a surprisingly cheerful breakfast, Allen having accidentally let slip that he had had the best sleep in months and Tyki laughing and admitting to the same.  Something about sharing a bed with another person had that effect, he mentioned, and Allen flushed and smiled.  It was as Tyki washed dishes and Allen put them away, the picture of (albeit tentative) domestic happiness, that Road opened the door and Sheryl burst through, ready to protect his brother’s virtue.

In reality, he had to discretely hold a handkerchief to stem the small trail of blood leaking from his nose, but that was probably just a reaction to the steam from the hot water. 

“Irmão!  O que aconteceu aqui?” Sheryl demanded, impassioned and ready to leap to Tyki’s defence.  Tyki flushed slightly and fixed his brother with a glare.

“Speak English, brother, be polite to our new family.  Boy, this is my…brother…Sheryl.  Sheryl, this is Allen Walker, who has agreed to join us for a time.”  Tyki, Allen noticed, seemed oddly nervous.

“Tyki!  I asked you what has happened here!  Has this…Allen…made some attempt on your virtue?”  Sheryl’s threads, Tyki noticed with grim amusement, were already forming from his fingertips.

“Brother…you should be aware that I have no virtue to be had.  Had I, though, the answer would be no.”  Tyki edged closer to Sheryl, hands raised as if to display his innocence of anything untoward.  Allen flushed at the suggestion that he had made any such attempt.

“Very well…  We will speak more later, Tyki.  As for this…Allen…” Sheryl trailed off, a vaguely murderous look in his eye.  Tyki sighed.

“I shall bring him to our Earl.  Tricia must be wondering where you are?” Tyki asked, hopefully.

“Ah!  Yes, you’re right!  Very well, but if he tries anything, you must let me know immediately!  I refuse to be left out!”  Sheryl crossed his arms. 

 _Wait…what?_ Allen glanced up at Tyki, confused, only to see a light blush on the Noah’s face.  

“Brother…you’re giving me goose bumps once again...please return to your wife.”  Tyki had an air of desperation, Allen noted.  Weird.  Who would have guessed the guy who destroyed his innocence and arm and almost killed him had such a weird family? 

Actually, it kind of made sense when he thought about it.

Sheryl made a noise of frustration and spun on his heel, stalking back through the door.  Tyki made a kind of vague, apologetic noise and motioned for him to step through the gate. 

“I apologize for Sheryl.  He has…bizarre tendencies, and I can’t really say he’s a good guy at heart but he is…dedicated to family?  That being said, I would not recommend any situation that would lead to you being alone with him.  At least for now.”  Tyki laughed.  Allen blinked.

_Right.  Note to self._

They stepped into the Ark, and Allen couldn’t stop himself for pausing and inhaling in surprise.  The Earl had styled the new Ark to take the shape of a city, like the old one, but this was on a larger and grander scale.  A central tower rose up from the centre, surrounded by buildings that appeared to be populated by Akuma, levels two or three.  The buildings were tall, curved and in the modern Victorian style, elaborate balconies and arches defying physics.  The tower was wide, and would have fit several buildings within it.  At the top was a clock face with the Earl’s demonic mask emblazoned on it, gloved hands contorting to display the time.  The sky was a deep, unnatural blue with clouds of an almost pinkish hue floating about.  They had stepped out of a door embedded on a wall, and as Tyki’s foot left the doorway it closed and disappeared immediately.  Fascinated by the bizarre architecture, Allen was barely aware of his immediate surroundings.

Hence the unmanly squeal forced from his chest as a small, spiky haired girl he immediately identified as Road tackled him, pressing her lips to his cheek and then tugging him into a thoroughly indecent kiss.  Tyki chuckled while Allen, caught in Road’s grip, shot him the finger.  Finally, she released him, only to fix Tyki with a glare that, Allen suspected, could probably wilt plants.

Tyki’s hands were up again, and Road passed directly through his stomach as she launched herself at him, rage incarnate.  Unfortunately for Tyki, Noah weren’t immune to one another’s powers and his eyes immediately glazed over, body crumpling as Road pulled his consciousness into her dream.  Allen watched, apprehensively, as her own face briefly slackened and then returned, Tyki regaining consciousness immediately, colour literally draining away from his face and body as he slid back into his ‘white’ form.

“Silly Tyki!  Wiseley’s been twitching all day thanks to you!  Go say sorry!”  Road giggled, dispute apparently resolved.

“Ah…yes…Wiseley, right…”  Tyki swayed briefly on the spot before waving and staggering off, feet occasionally slipping into the road or catching on air.  Allen watched with some concern before he appeared to begin to pull himself together, somewhat.

Allen stared at Road as the girl waved cheekily before grabbing his hand and tugging him towards the tower, humming some upbeat tune.

“Tyki told me _everything_ that happened!  He’s so sweet you know, Allen?  The Earl is going to be _so excited_ to see you!  Not as excited as me, of course.  Oh, and I can’t _wait_ to show you everything you’ve been missing out on!  The Earl and I operate the Ark, but just ask me if you want to go travelling!  We can get wine in the _Loire_ , churros in Barcelona, seafood in Santorini…”  Road described the possibilities, Allen’s stomach making rather undignified noises despite his sense of unease.  A sense that only grew as they drew closer to the tower. 

“Allen…it has been _so long_ since we last met.  Tyki-pon has informed me of your circumstances, and we agreed that you can stay as long as you want.  You can, of course, come talk to me at _any time_ , about _absolutely anything_!  Think of me as…a father?”  The Earl’s mask’s grin grew wider.  Allen forced himself to not shudder.  Road beamed.

“That’s very…generous?”  Allen smiled weakly.

“It is, isn’t it?  Now then.  The fourteenth floor is yours to make your own, while I have the top floor.  We each take the floor that corresponds to our memory, except for myself…After the fourteenth floor, you have a common floor, followed by a training floor.  Storage is in the basement, but if you need anything find myself or one of the Noah and they will get it for you!”  The Earl bounced on his heels, smiled again and vanished in a puff of pink, rose scented smoke.  Allen felt himself breathe properly.  Excellent.

“Oh, and the Earl didn’t mention it, but don’t go into the sub-basement!”  Road giggled despite the deadpan tone she’d just used.  Allen laughed with her, somewhat shakily before Road’s head cocked to one side, like she was listening.

“Huh.  Seems like I gotta go, but I’ll definitely see you later, Allen!”  She winked and blew a kiss before a broomstick flew down and scooped her up, carrying her off.  Allen waved goodbye.

Sighing as he wondered what he’d gotten himself into, Allen entered the tower.

The first floor was a lobby of sorts, with a painting of the Earl hanging between each of the seven elevators, all featuring a different, cutesy pose.  A cold sweat started on Allen’s spine.  Shivering, he entered an elevator, trying not to process the pastel purple interior as he selected the fourteenth floor.

 _My old place, huh?  Back in the day, there only_ were _fourteen floors.  Seems we’ve been downgraded.  You should kill them all and take over the Ark._

_Could you please not speak unless it’s somehow useful?_

_That’s not how Noahs work, kiddo.  Be grateful I’m not forcing you to rip off that damned arm…yet._

_Yet?_

_Thought you didn’t want me to speak?_

_Ah.  Touché._

Neah didn’t continue, but Allen could feel a general sense of smugness.  Prick.

The elevator opened with a pleasant ding.  Allen walked inside, only to stop in surprise.  The elevator opened into a wide, high-ceilinged empty space, unlike anything he’d ever seen in cleanliness and sheer white emptiness.  The space was, literally, the entire floor with the only ‘walls’ being a single sheet of glass that extended from floor to ceiling at the tower’s border.  Allen had never seen so much glass in his life, and despite being that the Ark was made entirely out of dark matter it was still an imposing sight. 

_Oi.  Get on it, would you?  Stop standing around like a stunned little kid.  You're embarrassing my legacy._

_Your legacy is unsuccessful mass murder._

_...It was all part of my plan.  I’ll lend you my abilities for a bit, you undeserving child.  Start thinking about the design.  You have to intimidate and impress the others or they won’t accept you and you won’t be able to kill them all and become the new Earl._

_Oh, how generous thou art._

_Don’t test me, brat. I don't have to allow you the privilege of manipulating dark matter._

And with that pleasant exchange, Allen grimaced as instinct flooded his mind, Neah’s memories leaking in and instructing him on how to shape the Ark.  Allen spent the rest of the day designing and bickering with Neah about the shades of the walls.

* * *

 

Tyki would have _loved_ to have gone back to his room and been left alone.  Alas, twas not to be.  Firstly, to recover from his so-called niece’s treatment was a large enough ask.  He grimaced, involuntarily.

_Consciousness dragged into the dream, Tyki opened his eyes to a replica of Road’s quarters.  Everything with animals, candy, bright colours and designs and the scent of spun sugar.  He almost vomited as he stood, Road floating on the ground above him.  It was only as he rose that he realised his feet were manacled to the floor.  Road smiled, too many teeth to be human._

_“What did you do to Allen, Tyki?  You know my feelings about him.”_

_“Ohhh, does my reputation not answer your questions?”_

_“I can drag out your memories, Uncle.”_

_“Allen would be embarrassed to have a lady remembering such a…sordid night.”  Tyki laughed, keeping his voice low, seductive._

_Road smirked._

_“This is why you’re my favourite, Tyki-tik.  Pleasure suits you best.”_

_“And you’re only happy when you’re dreaming.”_

_Road grinned, pointed candles surrounding him.  The dream lasted an instant of reality, but once inside it felt like as long as Road decided.  His niece, Tyki had learned early, was not her age.  She had appetites that were too close to Sheryl’s for comfort.  Once inside the dream, complete control belonged to her, if one was unlucky enough to be a human._

_Tyki was more than human, luckily, and stepped through the manacles easily._

_“Sorry, kiddo.  Your uncle had a bit much to drink and so did he.  We shared a bed out of necessity.”  Tyki smiled as he continued forward, walking through her._

_“Gonna let me go?  Allen’s a Noah now, you know.  Exclusivity isn’t my game anyway, as you well know.”_

_Road laughed, sweet and young again as she spun her finger in a circled._

_“Consider this a warning, then!” She giggled as Tyki felt himself levitate upwards, spinning faster and faster as his stomach turned, flipped and churned with him as he came back to consciousness._

Sadistic kid, he reflected.  Sheryl’s influence, no doubt.

Well, if that had been the only bad bit of his day, it would’ve been a good day.  Alas, Wiseley was another problem altogether.

The fifth floor always smelled like cloves, and Tyki’s nose twitched as he entered.  Wisely was stretched out on a cushion larger than himself, staring upwards in an apparent daze.  Tyki cleared his throat, only for Wisely to immediately turn to face him, cheeks pink.

“Ahh, Tyki, I had no idea you had inclinations toward Allen of that nature!  My apologies, I was only checking your safety!”  Tyki sighed, fixing his pseudo-nephew’s non-demonic eyes with a look of pure exhaustion.

“Please just look at my memories and spare me the effort, Wisely.” Tyki requested, collapsing onto another cushion and waiting as a subtle pressure built in his head that he’d come to associate with Wisely’s influence.

After what felt like an eternity, the pressure drained and Wisely’s flush deepened.

“I see.  That certainly is scandalous.  Road will probably kill you if she finds out.”  Wisely smiled serenely.  Tyki felt himself flush at the realisation that Wisely had checked up to the present.

“It was an accident, she’d understand.  I thought he was a cute girl!”  Tyki defended himself.

Wiseley just smirked as Tyki fought back the urge to reject his cushion right out from under his ass and instead stood and turned to the elevator.

“Still, how many cute white-haired girls do you know?” Wisely asked, cheekily.  Tyki just smirked at the sound of body hitting floor and a noise of surprise and dismay. 

He took the elevator up to the Earl’s quarters, but was spared that lecture through some accident of fate as the Earl had left a note detailing his sudden need to pick up more wool for some project.  Counting himself lucky, Tyki returned to his own, opulently decorated, quarters.  Built based on the popular Portuguese and British styles, with a grand oil of the Kamelot family in the living room.  Sheryl had tried to install a painting of himself in the bedroom, but Tyki had rejected the damn thing immediately.  Since everything in the Ark was made out of manipulated dark matter, the painting had been a perfect representation of his brother, captured by his brother’s fevered imagination.  The seedy smile had prevented Tyki from sleeping. 

He still shivered when he thought about it.

Wishing he could reject memories, Tyki collapsed onto the rich, wine coloured sheets of his bed.

“ _Porra_.” He muttered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Irmão! O que aconteceu aqui?- Brother! What happened here?  
> Porra- Fuck
> 
> Haha, thanks so much everyone for the kudos and especially the reviews! As always, feedback is very much loved <3!!  
> Also, I confess to using google translate for my Portuguese, but if anyone knows the language and can let me know if there are any problems with mine PLEASE LET ME KNOW. Alternatively, if you know a good website to learn Portuguese from let me know as well because hey, I love grammar and suffering and knowledge (almost as much as I love Lamborghinis, incidentally)


	3. This Family Sucks

_Allen felt tremors pass down his spine as the sudden realisation that he was dreaming hit.  The half-moon in the sky bloated, light brightening until a painfully yellow sun hung in its place, the grass in the field he’d been standing on growing thicker, neon green and swaying independent of the light, warm breeze tickling the back of his neck.  Allen turned to see Neah stepping out of his shadow, an uncharacteristically apprehensive expression on his face._

_“Road’s here, kid.  Buckle up.”_

_“Oh, lovely.  Thanks so very much for being useless, as usual.”_

_“Hey, if it weren’t for me you’d be sleeping on the ground tonight.  To repay me, you should definitely kill her as soon as she appears.”_

_“Do it yourself, prick.”_

_Neah crossed his arms, face turned up in a look of disdain at the very suggestion._

_It was then that Allen felt a familiar change in the air, and hurled himself to the side out of instinct…only for Road to catapult straight past him and grip Neah around the neck, planting a kiss on his cheek._

_Allen felt weirdly confused at her apparent lack of interest in him._

_Neah shot him a look of utter despair as Allen shrugged.  He wondered briefly if Tyki had ever had to deal with his inner Noah shooting him obscene gestures.  He’d have to ask for tips later._

_“Neah!  It’s been years!”  She smiled, and Neah paled considerably._

_“You look…just the same?”  His voice, Allen noted, was considerably higher than normal._

_“Aw…Are you worried I’d hold a grudge over last time?  Don’t worry, honeybear, the Earl and I are_ very forgiving _.”  Road’s head turned to one side as her left hand trailed down Neah’s chest, pressing a thumb over his left nipple.  Allen felt mildly uncomfortable._

_“Oh…that’s…good?”  Neah laughed nervously as Road smirked, making eye contact with Allen._

_“You picked a cute host this time around, too.  I like him.”  She almost sang, finally letting go of Neah’s neck only to slam one foot into his stomach, forcing the air out of his lungs as he doubled over in pain._

_“So it’s like that, still?” He coughed out, an air of confidence about him now.  Road pushed him back into a cushion that appeared at her whim, running her tongue over her bottom lip as Neah lounged, looking at her with an expression that Allen would almost call…hungry, considering he'd just had the wind knocked out of himself._

_“Like I said, no grudges held.  I’ve missed you, after all…looks like you missed me too, huh?”  Road giggled as Allen was treated to the disturbing sight of Neah flushing._

_“You could say that, sure.” He purred, as Road hopped into his lap, knees on either side of his thighs as she teased his nipple again, slipping into a deep kiss as Neah moaned, hips flexing as she pulled away his shirt.  Allen was frozen, unable to look away as Road pulled Neah’s hands up above his head, a brightly coloured ribbon twining around them as he swung his arms behind his head, a sigh of pleasure as Road’s hands moved lower down to his stomach, fingers hooking into the waistband of his loose pants.  Neah grinned, head turning to look at Allen and laugh at his poor vessel._

_“Is the kid invited, Road?  If not, his staring is giving me the creeps.”_

_“Aw…Isn’t it cute?” She murmured, turning to look at Allen herself.  Allen crossed arms and attempted to fix them both with the same look he’d give Cross when he caught him engaged in unsavoury activities.  Strangely, that look didn’t come as easily as normally.  He quickly banished thoughts that that might be due to the fact that Cross had never attempted to come on to him, nor had Allen ever felt any sort of sexual tension towards his arsehole of a master._

_Neah fixed Road with a pleading look.  She sighed._

_“Fine…Allen, don’t be jealous!” She sang, even as Allen suddenly experienced a large, bright purple wall slamming down in front of him.  Slapping himself lightly across the face to regain some semblance of focus, he felt himself going red as he processed what he’d just been witness to, not to mention that Road had locked him out of his own damn dream.  Her dream.  Whatever._

_She’d been generous enough to provide a shower, which Allen discovered only produced cold water.  Cute.  Luckily, Allen was practiced at distracting himself thanks to Cross pulling eerily similar manoeuvres on him on a regular basis.  After using the shower, Allen sat with his back straight and began to practice meditation until Road saw fit to allow him to wake up._

_If the wall wasn’t entirely soundproof, he didn’t notice because he was absolute focused on clearing his mind and ridding himself of desire.  Yes.  That sounded excellent._

Finally, after what felt like hours, Allen woke up to find himself lying in bed, apparently still in dire need of a cold shower and feeling distinctly unrested.  Sighing in displeasure, he swung his feet out bed and stretched.  He tried to ignore the smug, satisfied feeling that he knew was _not his_ and padded into his ensuite bathroom, taking in the light shadows under his eyes and the appearance of a blush high on his cheeks.  He looked like Cross did when his master returned from whatever lover he'd taken's house or brothel, usually with a loan in hand and a rare lack of a (serious) hangover.  Utterly debauched.

_You look like I feel!_

Allen chose to ignore that frankly disturbing comment from his inner Noah and plunged his head under the shower, the rest of his body following reluctantly after.

* * *

 

Frankly, when Tyki finally found himself awake and in the elevator to the common room, he didn’t _want_ to know why Road looked uncharacteristically tired but significantly more pleased.  Hell, she was practically… _glowing_.  He wasn’t entirely sure why, but some instinct told him to feel somewhat bad for Allen, a hunch that was confirmed when he saw the poor kid step into the elevator and immediately go bright red when Road blew him a kiss.  Slight sympathy aside, he wasn’t able to hold back a chuckle when Allen immediately stood on the side of the elevator furthest away from her, putting Tyki in the middle of the three.  Allen glared at him and he winked back.  The kid shot him the finger, looking distinctly unimpressed.

Well, whatever.

The three got out of the elevator and immediately headed to raid the food store.  Well, he and Allen did, Road seemed to pull candy from thin air and eat it, sitting on the Earl’s lap, which earned a jealous look from Sheril when he arrived and sat opposite.  Lulu Bell was curled up in front of the fire in cat form, and Allen’s eyes kept flicking to her out of nervousness.  Not that Tyki couldn’t get that, Lulu had taken great pleasure in recounting the numerous times she’d almost terrified him to death.  Allen’s earlier glare returned to his mind, and he choked back laughter before finding a pastry and making himself an espresso while Allen started frying eggs, bacon, onions and a host of other food.  Tyki’s jaw almost dropped at the sheer magnitude of food.

“Hey, boy, are you just here because the Order kicked you out for eating their entire budget?” He exclaimed in shock.  Allen stared back at him as though it was the most normal thing in the world.

“What? Is the Noah clan too poor for me to eat a breakfast?  You want me surviving on dark matter alone or something?”  He fired back.  Tyki blinked.  Allen was…oddly aggressive this morning.

“Ah…I was just…surprised?  You don’t look like you eat a lot!”  He tried, attempting a compliment as Allen’s eyes narrowed.

“What, are you calling me skinny?  Short?  I’m not a _beansprout_ , bastard.  I eat like a _man_.” Allen gave him a truly murderous look as Tyki held up his hands in what he hoped was a placating manner.

“Beansprout?  What?  Nothing of the shor- ah, sort!  I’ll, ah, leave you to it, boy!”  He choked out as Allen’s fingers twitched in a mildly threatening manner.  Disconcerted, he walked straight through the kitchen wall and back into the main area, twitching slightly as he realised he’d just walked directly through Sheril, who had let out a noise that sounded _far too much like he enjoyed being passed through_. 

Tyki sat down next to Lulu Bell and petted her, wishing she was a real cat as he sipped his espresso and attempted to convince himself that there was nothing wrong with his life.   She purred and allowed him to scratch her behind the ears, which was somewhat reassuring.  He tried not to think about the fact that she was technically not a cat at all, and he was arguable scratching a human woman's ears, ignoring Sheril to the best of his abilities and staring into the fire in a meditative manner.  At some point, the sounds of cooking stopped and Allen came out to eat.  Tyki was not scared to make eye contact, exactly, but simply too busy petting Lulu Bell.  Watching the weirdly hypnotic sight of the kid all but inhaling his breakfast through the reflective surface of the painting above the fireplace didn’t count.

* * *

 

Allen finished his breakfast quickly, much to the surprise of the surrounding Noah.  Sheril remarked that even Skinn Boric would be put to shame, which Allen chose to took as a compliment, while Wisely had wandered to sit next to Tyki and pet Lulu Bell as well, complaining that Allen’s pleasure was giving him a headache.  His cheeks were oddly pink, but Allen put it down to pain. 

Road giggled every time their eyes met, and Allen’s cheeks were soon pinker than Wisely’s, much to the Earl’s apparent amusement. 

It was after he finished that the Earl stood and left, Road waving and following after.  Immediately, Sheril turned to face him from his spot at the other end of the bench at the table.  “Allen, the Earl tends to leave me in charge of the day-to-days of the Ark.  Of course, normally we move about the world at our leisure, but given your arrival we’ve all been asked to stay here for the rest of the week and get to know you.  I personally am not interested in getting to know you, but for the sake of practicalities we’ll need you to do some training in order to gauge your abilities so far.  Jasdevi are waiting for you on the next floor for that purpose, and I suggest you meet them before they decide to kill you out of impatience.  Now then, Tyki, we have matters to deal with, do we not?”  Sheril tapped his foot as his brother stood, an expression of mild despair on his face.

“That wouldn’t be the…taxes...would it?” He asked, and Allen _almost_ felt sorry for him.

“Oh”, purred Sheril with disturbing relish, “The taxes _and_ the wages of the staff, brother dearest.  Let’s hope that you are as good at accounting as you are at counting cards, shall we?”

And with that, the two left, Tyki sending one last look of pain towards Wisely, which was immediately answered by a cheerful wave of the peace sign. 

“Staff?  Are those two real noblemen?”  Allen asked, surprised.

“They’re somehow related to the Portuguese nobility, is my understanding.  You haven’t heard of the Kamelots?” Wisely asked.

“Kamelots?  Tyki’s last name is Mikk, isn’t it?” Allen replied.

“Sure, Tyki’s is, but Sheril’s is Kamelot and they call themselves brothers.  You’d have to ask them to explain, since I respect the privacy of the Noahs enough not to read their minds…without permission.   Road and I also share their name, but we’re adopted kids, not Kamelots in our own right.”  Wisely smiled, serene as Allen raised an eyebrow.

“Is Lulu Bell also secretly a princess?” He asked, curiosity now piqued.  In response, Lulu rolled onto her back and Wisely cooed as he rubbed her belly.

“Only in terms of beauty and intelligence!” Wisely said, earning a loud purr as he scratched under her chin.  Allen nodded and stood, putting his dishes in the kitchen before waving goodbye and heading for training.

When the elevator opened onto the training room, Allen could barely process the massive ceilings, supported by a series of massive iron beams that rose at random angles from the floor.  That was because Jasdero and Devit had just flown out of nowhere and driven their heels into his stomach, slamming him against one of said beams.  Gasping and praying for no broken ribs, Allen straightened his back and stood.

“What, are we just sparring then?” He asked, only for the twins to nod in synchronicity.

“Damn straight, shorty!  Only one rule, and that’s that ya can’t use your innocence!  If you’re gonna hang out with us, ya gotta be _like_ us, kapiche?” Devit yelled from atop one of the numerous platforms hanging between the beams.  Allen blinked.  No innocence?  Then what the hell…

_Oh you can’t be serious._

_They’re dead serious, kid.  Good.  It’s about time you work on being a proper vessel._

_No.  Hell no.  You are not taking over my body, you prick._

_That so?  They’ll kill you- see?_

And with that, the twins pointed their guns directly at his head, firing a massive red bullet towards him.  Acrobatics barely got him out of the way, and he cursed aloud.

_If I die you die too, and it took you years to come back last time.  Perhaps we could negotiate?_

_What, you want to work out a bloody deal now?  Fine.  Let me take over and I’ll let you not die, good?_

_What?  No, not good!  Give me your power and I’ll let you not die, how about that?_

Allen blinked as two more bullets barely missed him, the laughter of the twins following him as he leapt and twisted between beams to avoid them.

_Christ, you’re uncooperative today.  Fine, just because I’m still in a good mood, I’ll let you have a little bit.  If you get used to it, I suppose it’ll be easier for you to kill all of the Noahs and become the new Earl.  Be grateful, brat._

And with that grudging deal met, Allen blinked as a sudden wave of coldness spread across his skin, normally red hand turning grey as dark matter locked down his innocence, darkness spreading across his skin as he gasped at the unfamiliar feeling, almost hurtling into a beam as his strength suddenly increased.

_Don’t think I’m giving you anything special, by the way.  You’re on their level physically, but you’re out of your mind if you think I’m letting you play around with my abilities as the fourteenth._

_Oh, how very generous of you._

Allen grimaced in displeasure as Neah’s consciousness grew closer to his, instincts blurring to the point that he couldn’t tell whether it was him or Neah that was anticipating the twins’ shots anymore.  He could still separate thoughts and emotions, but that instinctive level of thought was merged almost completely.  Lovely. 

Luckily, the twins still weren’t taking him seriously.  Allen’s own superior athleticism let him circle around faster than they could follow, and he could feel power that wasn’t his as his legs bunched together before he exploded outwards, launching himself at the blond twin and catching him by surprise and decking him in mid-air before kicking away, aiming to get the dark haired one as well.  Unfortunately, the fear he’d been banking on was absent, and Devit just swung his revolver directly into his face, Allen’s eyes widening in shock as his finger moved in slow motion to pull the trigger.

 _Stupid bloody brat._ Neah muttered, and Allen felt a wave of energy as his left hand moved without permission, fast enough to grab the gun and kick his feet above it, leaping over Devit before he could shoot.  Allen barely managed to get behind another beam before a wave of nausea overtook him, sensation and weakness that wasn’t even his overpowering him as Neah’s energy left him, skin fading back to white as he panted, trying to stay conscious as his Noah passed out inside him.  As Neah’s energy disappeared entirely, Allen swooned, falling off the high platform as his eyes rolled back into his head.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh, poor Allen just can't win. He's a little too much fun to torture at this point, lol. Also, massive shoutout to everyone who's kudo-d/bookmarked/left reviews, you guys make my day!! Hope you enjoyed this as well!!


	4. Recovery

_"-len...?_  
Allen?  
Allen!"  
Allen groaned, lethargy all but overpowering him as he turned to face the voice. "...Cross?" He slurred in question, only to receive a sigh of impatience.

_"Not Cross, idiot. Shame though, I'd rather like to meet him. Based on what I'm seeing, he's a lot like Tyki!" Laughter echoed through his head. "No, it's Wisely. You've been unconscious for about an hour now. Wanna wake up anytime soon? Tyki's acting worried and it's giving me the creeps."_

_Allen groaned at the prospect of waking up. "...ten more-?" He whined, only to be abruptly cut off._

_"No! Get the hell up before the Earl makes me let Road in! God knows she wants to wake up your Noah personally, and I do not want to be a party to that!" The panic in Wisely's voice was enough to have Allen drag himself back to semi-consciousness, at least. Wisely sighed in relief, the sound trailing off eerily as Allen registered that he was dreaming now, rather than comatose. That realization faded as dreams began to take over, restless images that distracted him and made him forget, if momentarily, reality._

_His eyes took in the field and the man sleeping in it, the man he knew to be Neah. Neah was content, sprawled on his back in the sun with his arms behind his head. A small smile was broken only when he moved in his sleep, when a wince of pain coaxed groans and grimaces before he found a comfortable position and the smile returned. Allen walked closer, sitting at his side in confusion._

_Neah seemed vaguely aware of him, as sleepers often are, and rolled closer, those noises of discomfort raising the hair on Allen's neck even as Neah's head found its way onto his lap. Instinctively, Allen let his hand rest in the man's hair, stroking it as he enjoyed the sun in the field, the fresh scent of grass and soil. Neah murmured nonsense in his sleep, Allen's name, a sigh of Road's name that had Allen flushing, and Mana's name, with distress and love and sneering hate. Cross, too, but only ever in a sleepy frustration. Allen recognized the tone as something like what he typically took with his master and shivered again._

_The dream twisted again, Allen's idle thoughts running down a tunnel consisting of scattered scenes, brief moments that could make sense only to a sleeping mind . Another scene after many, however, took root and captured his attention for a moment.  
_

_Cross tapped the board once with his ruler.  
"Right, idiot apprentice. It seems that you've overtaxed yourself once again, despite my instruction against it. If you insist on disobeying me, I would suggest that you choose to do so in a field that would be somehow beneficial. For example, you could break curfew and go down to a pub, or a whorehouse and learn to enjoy life." Cross folded his arms in disgust._

_"Well, perhaps if I were better instructed in how to control my strength this wouldn't have happened. If only I had a master who could possibly understand matters of control. Alas, it seems God has forsaken me." Allen sighed at the tragedy of it all._

_"If my idiot apprentice was capable of listening, perhaps he'd realize the skill of his master? Alas, I too have been forsaken"- and here Cross sighed in a mockery of said apprentice. "Of course, communication in general is one of your many weak points, hence this situation."_

_Allen blinked. "Situation? Is there one other than your numerous debts? Have you finally caught a veneral disease?" Allen was unable to suppress a note of glee at that last question, and from there the dream twisted back into the scattered imaginings typical of deep sleep._

* * *

 

Allen didn't wake until noon the next day, and he could still feel Neah's sluggish exhaustion, although the Noah had also managed to regain consciousness (not enough to manage any comments at his expense, luckily). When he did wake he found a mass of food on a trolley next to his bed, and Tyki Mikk and Wisely both sitting at the foot of said bed. Allen realize he had grabbed Tyki's stretched out legs in his sleep and had been resting his head on Tyki's ankle. A deep flush stole across his face as he released them and made to sit upright, only to realize that he was wearing nothing but boxers. Boxers which, by the expensive feel of the cloth, were not his.

Wisely laughed at his distress. "They're mine, actually. The Earl's getting you new clothes, you couldn't keep wearing those old rags anyway. Oh, and Jasdevi dressed you, since they felt guilty." Allen blinked  
"I thought you didn't read minds without permission?" He inquired, mildly concerned.  
"Oh, I just guessed from your body language, don't worry. I'd _never_ abuse the demon eye like that!" Wisely said cheerfully, even as Tyki choked on his wine.

Allen raised an eyebrow, but he'd seen 'seers' in the circus who could fool the common folk by judging appearances and body language to come up with their so-called fortunes, so he supposed it was possible. Tyki's half-choking laughter and Wisely's displeased expression weren't exactly a good sign, though.

From what Allen had seen, Noah weren't overly concerned with "abusing" their powers anyway. Tyki frequently passed through walls if it was quicker than taking the conventional route to where he was going, Lulu Bell seemed to enjoy pretending to be a cat purely to have an excuse to nap in front of the fireplace in the common room and he'd noticed Sheril's food preparing itself while the man himself reclined in a chair and watched. Then you had Road, who apparently used her powers to _invade the dreams of others and make love to their inner Noah_. Not that he was bitter about that, or jealous. Definitely not.

Wisely's cheeks, Allen noticed, had grown slightly pink. His facial expression hadn't changed at all as the three sat together, Tyki sipping his wine and watching the two with some amusement.

_In that case, if I can get him to blush it'll prove he's listening._

Allen's face took on a thoughtful expression as he sorted through his memories for something suitably provocative, and immediately settled on Cross. When they'd been travelling in Mongolia, Cross had found possibly the only brothel in the country and had immediately fallen in with the Madam...and her 'business partner', a man about Cross's age with long, dark hair and the lean muscles of a former messenger. Allen dimly recalled that both the Madam and her partner had had a propensity for filthy humour and a tea that Cross had enjoyed but refused to allow Allen to so much as sniff. In those days, Cross barely trusted him to deal with level ones, so his training consisted mainly of running errands with some sadistic condition attached.

Mongolians, Allen had learned, were mostly nomadic people who rode horses and were masterful archers. They lived in spacious tents called _yurts_ , which could be several meters in radius and, at the collection of yurts that made up the brothel, those yurts often smelled of incense, a scent Allen didn't recognize but would later identify as opium, and a not unpleasant musk. They were all kept lit with oil lamps, and most people living in the area were nocturnal (as was the nature of the brothel). Thus, when Allen returned from his last errand it was roughly 3 in the morning. He'd been early only because he'd been able to charm a ride out of one of the locals to a different settlement, and once there had discovered that the people there were far wealthier than they'd expected. He'd made the required amount quickly and returned back a few hours before Cross had expected him. Pleased with his accomplishment, he'd ignored Tim's warning growl at Cross's tent and had flung open the entrance. There, he had been traumatized for the first, but not the last time by his master.

Cross, sitting atop the Madam's partner who lay beneath him, face turned away from Allen. The Madam, sitting atop Cross and leaving a hungry trail of bruises down his chest. Allen had noticed the marks often enough on Cross before, but never had he realized how they were formed. Finally, Cross himself. His master was moving roughly, and Allen understood in sudden graphic detail exactly the nature of the mysterious acts that took place between men and men as well as men and women. Cross actually moaned, and Allen in stunned paralysis briefly wondered if that was what _his_  penis would look like when he grew up before Tim grabbed his ear and dragged him out of the room. Allen never knew if Cross had found out he'd seen, but his master took him out hunting game the next night and they ate like kings.  All the while both of their complexions leaning themselves more towards the colour of Cross's hair than Allen's.

Allen had grown desensitized to such misfortunes over the years, so his facial expression didn't change over the few seconds it took to recall the sordid scene in graphic detail. Wisely was less lucky.

With a choked exclamation that Sheril needed him for something, Wisely leapt off the bed with his cheeks flaming and nose bleeding. Tyki turned at his nephew's odd tone and immediately spat his wine out as he and Allen burst into laughter as the unlucky young psychic fled to safer, less depraved territory.

"Was that _you_ who did that?" Tyki exclaimed, still laughing.  
Allen smirked as he confessed his guilt, and Tyki's laughter only grew.   
"I used to do the same, fantasizing like that, until he learned not to look. It's the only way the kid'll learn to respect privacy, apparently. His prudishness makes up for Sheril and Road's depravity, I think!" Tyki laughed again as Allen fixed him with an incredulous look.

"Just Sheril and Road's depravity, is it?" Allen asked. Tyki shrugged.   
"I'm not depraved. There's nothing wrong with seeking pleasure in life!" He defended himself. Allen's eyebrow raised once more. "Hedonism is almost the definition of depravity, Mikk." Allen observed wryly.   
"What are you, then? A Puritan? With a master like Cross?" Tyki countered.   
"Most people assume I am, actually." Allen said, surprised. Tyki blinked. "Really? After the way you stripped my gang on the train, people still thought that? I'm almost offended..." He said, caught between depression and arousal at the memory.  
"Arystar thought it was cute, actually!" Allen smiled, cheerfully.   
Tyki pressed on, intrigued now. "But they were wrong, boy?" He asked, privately noting that Allen was plenty cute.

Allen grinned now and pushed himself up, and Tyki got one lovely look at the boy's scarred, hard body so much like his own before Allen had straddled him, one hand in his hair and tugging him forward while the other gripped his shoulder. Tyki found his eyes slipping shut in pleasure as Allen kissed him, firm and commanding. Tyki had to consciously stop himself from falling through the bed again as he sighed into Allen's mouth, the boy's tongue slipping past his lips and tasting him. Tyki groaned as hands traced over his own chest, feeling a tug as his hair was pulled out of the usual ponytail. His own hands came up, pulling Allen closer and reaching out to touch his own chest. It was as his finger brushed across a nipple that Allen pulled away, a light blush on his cheeks. Tyki was vaguely aware that he had the beginnings of an erection, a fact made rather obvious by the tight grey pants he wore. Allen grinned.

"What do you think, Mikk?" He asked, and it took Tyki a while to recall what they had been discussing.  
" _Not_ a Puritan, no. And call me Tyki, Allen." He purred. Allen's grin grew wider.   
"Excellent, Mikk! Now then, I've barely eaten any of this food" and here he motioned to the trolley, "and frankly, I'm starving! If I could have three more trolleys like this, I think I will be well on my way to recovery!" Allen shot a winning smile. Tyki fought to keep his blood flowing to socially appropriate areas. Still somewhat dazed, he nodded. "I'll see what can be done then, boy!" He agreed, and then he walked directly through the wall towards the elevator. Alone, Allen let his own, vaguely evil smile fall into a softer one as he laid back on his bed. Mikk, he realized, hadn't even has the presence of mind to tie back up his hair.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm incredibly flattered and surprised by the response this fic has gotten!! Thank you all so much and I hope you enjoyed this chapter as well!!


	5. Keeping Up With the Kamelots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something like a plot emerges, how to control your inner evil and the use of Akuma blood-oil in the culinary arts- weird or wonderful?

Allen actually ate six more trolleys of food, all brought up by an increasingly less flustered Tyki Mikk.  When he brought up the last one, Road was sitting on his shoulders and humming something that sounded like a cross between the Fourteenth's song and a nursery.  It raised the hair on the back of Allen's neck, but he got a sleepy sense of happiness from Neah at least.  Actually, Road on Tyki's shoulders would have been a cute image, if Neah hadn't offhandedly once mentioned she was over forty.  That was a realization that had had Allen shuddering for a good hour or so.

After both had finished gawking at him eating, Road leapt off Tyki's shoulders to sit (uncomfortably) close to Allen, while Tyki sat on the other side of him and pulled out a cigarette, lighting it in one practiced motion.  Involuntarily, Allen's nose wrinkled and Road laughed. 

"When are you gonna stop with those, Tyki?  Dad says they make you look like a commoner!"  Road said, smirking as Tyki took a drag.

"I'll stop whenever I want.  If it annoys him, all the better." Tyki replied, in a tone that suggested that this was an ongoing debate.  Allen sighed, depressed.

"Just when I escaped Cross, someone else has arrived to blow that crap into my hair and clothes?"  He asked an uncaring God, leaning as far away from Tyki as possible.  

"What, you don't enjoy the smell, boy?"  Tyki asked, surprised.  Road watched with a smirk that looked far too old and evil for her young face.

"The only person who could enjoy that is a chimney sweep who's lost all sense of smell."  Allen replied,

smiling.  Tyki blinked, a rare look of conflict on his face.  Allen choked back a crow of triumph.  

"...I suppose that I could smoke later."  Tyki allowed, dropping the barely smoked cigarette into a glass of water.  Road buried her face in Allen's chest to hide her grin and muffle her sudden, cackle like laughter, and Allen felt a strange sense of nostalgia.  Probably Neah's, but still oddly comforting and enough to coax a smile that was more genuine than normal from him.  

He wondered if he should be concerned about the increasing degree to which Neah's emotions were intruding on his own.  Probably.  

_"Definitely.  You should just give up and let me take over permanently.  Seriously, consider it!"_

_"Lovely of you to ruin the moment, prick."_

Neah responded with what Allen supposed was the mental equivalent of a shrug, but remained silent as Tyki slug his arm around Allen and Road.  

"Oh, Road, didn't Sheril want to talk to you around now about the next Kamelot function?"  Tyki asked, with a barely disguised note of sadistic glee.  Road pouted in dismay.

"But uncle...can't I do it later?" She whined, sending what Allen supposed were puppy eyes up at him.  He shivered again.

"Nope!" Tyki all but sang, and Road's attempt at cuteness morphed with disturbing speed to murderous as she slipped slowly off the bed and slumped out the door.

"Is he talking again?"  Tyki asked, abruptly after Road left.  Allen blinked in surprise.

"You mean the...?"  He replied, weakly, and Tyki nodded, unusually seriously.

"Most of the Noah were able to take over their hosts personalities almost immediately.  My understanding is that the original consciousness influences them to some small degree, but it's Noah that's in charge.  My brother and I, along with Jasdevi, are different.  We're more like you, boy."  

"Like me?  Explain, Mikk."  Allen demanded.

"My personality is dominant over Joyd's.  It's something I've only come to understand since you stabbed me and I was swallowed, but it seems that I had been suppressing Noah, to the point where I inherited almost no memories.  Since that time, Joyd and I have grown closer, but I remain.  We are able to...speak, in a manner.  Our emotions and memories are linked."  Tyki sighed, crossing his hands behind his head.  "You understand what I'm describing, don't you?"  He asked.  Allen nodded.  "I've been a Noah for several years, boy. You won't be swallowed up if you are careful.  Communicate with your Noah, work out deals to share control, but never give it up.  Don't allow yourself to be controlled as I... was."  Tyki finished, with some disgust.  Allen felt strangely...guilty about his failed first attempt at exorcism.

"Mikk, I didn't realize that-" Allen began, only for Tyki to interrupt.

"Call me Tyki, boy.  We were both just following orders."  Tyki laughed, and squeezed his shoulder gently.  Allen smiled.  "Does...Joyd, was it?  Does he make snide comments about you at every opportunity as well?"  Allen inquired, and Tyki grinned.

"Joyd's not like the Fourteenth, he's more a collection of memory and instinct than a person.  I can tell whether he approves of my choices, though, and that's rare enough that if he could, I suspect he would."  Tyki laughed again.  "If the Fourteenth's memory lives on for seven thousand more years, he'll likely become the same."  He said.  Neah scoffed in Allen's head.

_"As if I would.  Joyd always picks idiots like this with too strong of a will for his own good.  He could speak if he were stronger."_

_"Aren't you in more or less the same situation?"  Allen retorted._

_"No, since I'm going to take over anyway eventually.  Joyd's got no ambition, so he's weak."_

 

Allen blinked in surprise at that.  Tyki noticed his expression and laughed.  "Snide comments from the Fourteenth, boy?" He asked.

Allen shrugged.  "He says that Joyd had no ambition and that...you should call him Neah or Musician or...'Almighty Master' apparently." Tyki blinked and considered it.  "The Four...Neah, rather, is probably right.  Joyd's memory is pleasure, and I provide him with enough of that to keep him satisfied.  He has no need for ambition."  Tyki winked.  Allen took a moment to process the smug, too attractive look on his face.

_"Kid, if you sleep with Joyd of all the annoying pricks you could possibly choose-" Neah began only for Allen to interrupt._

_"Like you can talk.  Road's practically a cougar, you arse."_

"How does that work, then?  You just indulge and that keeps your Noah calm?  What if I activated my innocence?"  Allen asked, intrigued. Tyki shrugged.  

"Pretty much.  He gets unstable if he doesn't get any pleasure, like that vampire exorcist when he runs low on blood.  Of course, _I_ tend to get unstable as well if that happens, but that’s different.  I should be able to control him if you activate your innocence, but some of the others might not manage as well.  Actually, boy, I have something for you!" Tyki exclaimed.  Allen blinked as Tyki pulled a glove out of the waistband of his pants.  The glove was white, with a black pentacle on the back and on the palm.  Tyki took Allen's left hand in his own and brought it up, brushing his lips across the back of it before running his finger across the flesh of Allen's palm, drawing a hiss of pain as his fingertips sliced through the upper layer of flesh. Allen watched carefully as Tyki slipped the glove on, the stars taking on a brief red glow before fading white into the fabric.  A dull ache spread up his arm until it reached his shoulder and faded.

"A sealing glove?"  He asked in surprise.

"The Skulls made it.  I think it works by circulating low levels of dark matter through the innocence, or something.  You can take it off anytime, but it'll stop Apocryphos from tracking you."  Tyki grinned.  “Of course, I could also cut off the arm entirely if you _wanted_ \- “He suggested, only for Allen to shake his head immediately.  Tyki sighed in disappointment. 

“In that case, I suppose that should be all, boy.  If you have any questions about your Noah, feel free to ask.  I suppose I’m probably the only one here who can help, other than my brother.  And he… _wouldn’t_ help, I suspect.”  Tyki laughed and slipped off the bed, flipping him a carefree wave as he left.  Allen waved back in surprise.

_“Oi.  Did Joyd just offer you the Noah version of The Talk?”  Neah asked with a note of horror._

_“Please don’t bring up The Talk.  I’m still traumatised from…Cross…”  Allen replied, fighting back flashbacks.  “Oh, and quit calling Mikk Joyd.  It’s weird.”_

_“Fuck you.  I’ll call him whatever I want, brat.” Neah responded.  Allen sighed._

Just as Allen had slid out of bed and was in the middle of a series of stretches, he heard another knock on the door and sighed.  He got back into bed for the sake of decency and called out for whoever it was to enter.

He was vaguely aware of his cheeks heating up in embarrassment at being forced to stay in bed to cover himself as Lulu Bell strode into his room with clothes draped over her shoulder.  “Don’t worry about it, I’ve seen most of the Noah naked at some point…unfortunately.” She smiled.  “Maitora and the Skulls made these up for you.  The Earl’s taste in clothing is somewhat…unique, so if you have any concerns about the design let one of us know and it’ll be passed on.”  Lulu dropped the clothes on his bed and turned her back.  “If you wouldn’t mind making sure that they fit…?”  She requested.

“Ah…Sure.”  Allen agreed, feeling somewhat indecent as he tugged on clothes, vaguely concerned about the finality of the feeling.  Not to mention, based on what he’d seen of the other Noah, the high likelihood for the ‘uniform’ to be highly provocative.  In reality, it was oddly reminiscent of his exorcist uniform.  Tight black pants paired with a white top that fastened below the hollow of his throat and flared out just above his belly button and ended at mid-thigh, sleeves tight around his arms and ending at his wrists.  A matching glove for his right hand was even included.  Finally, he’d been given black boots that came up to his calves.  Lulu seemed to sense when he’d finished and turned to look.

“It seems fine, I suppose.  You didn’t wear uniforms before though, did you?”  Allen asked, a vague memory of being assaulted by Tyki in a suit flitting through his mind.

“No, but since we’ve been able to get more organised the Earl deemed it…necessary.  For familial bonding, I believe.”  Lulu seemed fairly ambivalent about the whole thing. 

“No one minded?” Allen asked in surprise.

“Oh no…Actually, I believe Tyki and Sheril were both quite pleased with them.”  Lulu laughed and Allen grinned as well.  He could see Tyki being pleased with an opportunity to bare more skin than was socially acceptable. 

“Thank you, Lulu!”  Allen said, and she inclined her head gracefully in acceptance. 

“It is no trouble.  Although things between us have been different in the past, Noah consider themselves family.  As long as you are here, I consider you my brother.  I hope you can do the same for us.”  And with that, Lulu turned lightly and left him.

_“Kid, what the hell are you doing?  These people were your enemies last week, remember?  Why won’t you just let me take over and massacre them?”  Neah asked, sounding honestly intrigued._

_“They’ve been…kind to me.  Tyki saved my life when Apocryphos was chasing us, if you recall.  And thanks to_ you _, I can’t help the urge to be here, with them.  With the Earl.  And besides, it’s not as though the Black Order are exactly my allies at the moment.  Cross said there was more to this war, so maybe I should give them a chance.”  Allen sighed aloud, brow creasing._

_“Well, I suppose when I was alive, they weren’t a bad bunch, although I don’t know this new batch very well.  If you want to find out more about the war because of Cross, I won’t stop you.  Although I would prefer if you just gave up control to me.”  Neah said._

_“I…suppose I appreciate that, oh murderous psychopathic spirit who lives within me.”  Allen acquiesced._

_“Oh, you should.”_

* * *

 

After Road, Wisely and Sheril had finished discussing the finer details of Portuguese politics and who it would be wise to prevent Tyki from sleeping with at the next Kamelot dinner, the two younger Kamelots found themselves sitting in the common room eating sweets.  Road had managed to concoct some sort of akuma-oil flavoured fudge, and Wisely was still trying to work out whether he liked the stuff or not when she turned to him with a terrifying smile.

“So, you and Allen, huh?  I always thought you had a thing for that second exorcist…Kanda Yuu, I think.”  Road smirked.  Wisely felt his cheeks turn a deep red.  He couldn’t read Road’s mind, unfortunately, since her real body was out of his range.  It made her one of the most interesting people to be around, but also the most unpleasant.

“Using someone’s brain can be platonic.  It can even be _something that enemies do_.”  He defended himself.  Road grinned wider.

“Neah and I were enemies, but we still- “And here Wisely immediately clapped his fingers over his ears and began to recite the Lord’s prayer.  The irony of a Noah doing so was not lost on him.  Road pouted, but then regained her earlier expression.

“Don’t try to ignore my point, _brother_.  If you want Allen, you’ll have to share.”  She sang.  Wisely’s chanting stopped in surprise.

“Share with who?  _You_?”  He asked.

“Duh, Wisely.  Reading people’s thoughts all the time must have made you stupid.”  She said.  Wisely felt vaguely disturbed by the teenager-esque delivery from a forty-something year old. 

“I thought you and Neah…”  He asked weakly, not really wanting the answer. 

“Oh, we are.  But we’re not _married_ , idiot-Wisely.  That’s like…a fun thing.  You know, like nostalgia.  I mean, before he killed you and the others Neah was pretty fun. Allen looks like fun too.”  Road smiled as Wisely blanched.

“I ah…remember.  Unfortunately.  The memory is somewhat tainted by my _brutal murder at his hands_ , though.”  He argued.  Road shrugged.

“He never murdered _me_.” She defended.  Wisely supposed there wasn’t really anything he could say to that.

“Anyway, Allen might not even want you.  So there.” He crossed his arms in triumph at Road’s scandalised expression.

“Of course he wants me, Idiotly.  And you just admitted you have a _crush on him_!”  Road sang in victory.  Wisely realised his mistake and found himself filled with regret.  He had the feeling that the fool human who’s body he’d taken over was laughing at him on the inside, but dismissed that as paranoia.

“I did not.  And this fudge is weird.  Why did you make it out of akuma-oil anyway?”  He asked.  Road glared.

“It is not _weird_!  It’s delicious!  You have no taste for the finer things!”  Road immediately leaped to the defence of her sweets, and Wisely thanked the god he did not believe in that the conversation was over.

* * *

 

Sheril, who had been listening in on their conversation, was scandalised.  His adorable daughter and somewhat less adorable but still definitely cute son were _fighting over an exorcist’s body_?  And in a _non-murder way_?  This could not be permitted, but he also couldn’t admit that he knew their (evil) intentions.  As the master strategist retreated to his room, only three options seemed clear.

  * Option 1: Kill Allen and blame the Black Order.  Hope that the Earl does not kill me for this.
  * Option 2: Castration.  With a rusty butter knife.  Claim he did it to himself as a result of sexual deviancy, or blame the Black Order.  Somehow.
  * Option 3: Ensure that the brat is otherwise occupied and unsuspecting.



The third option, sadly, was the most realistic (he supposed).  And thus, Sheril realised that there was only one way to protect (most) of his family.  The answer was simple.  He would make damn sure that his morally loose and sexually promiscuous brother began to appreciate the finer things in life, like young British ass and monogamy.  The plan, Sheril assessed, was flawless.  The prospect of convincing his brother that exclusivity in a relationship was a benefit rather than an ‘unnecessary limitation’ was challenging, but Sheril was confident that if he could at least convince his brother that a relationship could last longer than a night, he’d have a good shot at things.  He chuckled softly under his breath, lacing his fingers together and staring into the brightly crackling fireplace in his room.  Yes, Sheril Kamelot, diplomat, minister and master strategist, responsible for the politics of nations and the annihilation of thousands, to whom failure did not exist would make this his mission.  If he had had a cat on hand (dammit, Lulu Bell, her timing was always poor), he would have stroked it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm blown away by the response that this fic has had!! I don't know what I'm doing but I'm glad you guys are enjoying it so far! Reviews are a writer's main sense of nutrition so please feel free to let me know what you liked, what you hated and why it was Sheril!! Does anyone else feel conflicted every time he gets screentime in Hallow thanks to the clearly obscene amount of money going into making him attractive or is that just me? Feel free to answer that question too! Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter <3


	6. Kept Up With the Kamelots (?)

Wisely looked at his so-called father in horror.  For once, he wished he couldn't read the scheming bastard's mind.  Unlike most people, Sheril had a unique gift for being singleminded to the point that Wisely tended to get depressed at the sheer hopelessness of trying to influence him.  At least if he couldn't feel Sheril's determination he could have hope.  

"You only just recalled?"  He asked in desperation.  Sheril's pleasure, Wisely noted, only increased at his distress.  Sadistic ass.  

"Oh yes.  I apologize for the oversight, but you understand the importance of appearance."  Sheril actually licked his lips.  Wisely shuddered.

"Road won’t...?" The answer was already clear in Sheril's twisted psyche. Brilliant.  

And that was how Wisely found himself in Allen Walker's quarters, uncomfortably attracted to his new, skin flashing (although arguably conservative for the Earl's usual taste) clothes.  Luckily, the demon eye informed him that despite the 14th's annoyance, Allen had agreed to help him and thus he was spared the agony of waiting for verbal confirmation.  When Allen finished his brief façade of considering and they sorted out the details, Wisely left him to prepare and retired to his own quarters.   Although he was an ancient, powerful being, the thought of sticking it to 'daddy' as Sheril insisted on being called, was enough to induce snickers as he waited for Allen to meet him.

* * *

 

Allen stared at himself in mild confusion in the mirror.  Neah laughed at his reflection gleefully until Allen reminded him that  _this is your body too, you arse_.  Wisely grinned.

"Slicking your hair back doesn't make you look as dignified as I expected. Neah's off the mark with 12, you look about 8."  Wisely said thoughtfully.

"Brilliant.  Can I wash the wax out, then?"  Allen requested through gritted teeth,

"What?  No!  Tyki's wax took me a lot of effort to steal."  Wisely exclaimed.

"This is  _Mikk's_  bloody wax?"  Allen yelped in shock.  Suddenly his hair felt much filthier than before.  Wisely's eyes all widened in horror as Allen neatly sidestepped him and ran for the bathroom, putting his head under the sink before Wisely could stop him.  

"Fine, wash it out, but you have to put the stuff back.  Ungrateful savage." Wisely sniffed in disgust as Allen sighed in relief as his hair returned to normal.

_"At least pull it back.  It might make you look like an adult, even."  Neah sniped._

_"I will, but not because you told me to, old man."  Allen returned._

It did make him look older, Allen admitted.  Wisely approved, and left him to change his clothes before they left.  Luckily, Wisely preferred a looser fit and thus the suit fit Allen well, if somewhat tight in the biceps and shoulders.  Allen had noticed that Wisely's build was on the lank side, but he hadn't noticed the muscle he himself had put on in recent months.  A surprised smile crept across his face and he flexed in the mirror, enjoying the newfound strength.

_"You'd still lose to Lenalee in an arm-wrestle though, kid."  Neah observed._

_"I might not.  And I'd definitely beat you, since you have no physical form and all, you degenerate ghost."  Allen answered with cheer._

_Neah sulked._

Allen jumped as a sudden muscle spasm ran up his right arm, shaking the offending arm in surprise.  As the convulsion faded, Neah's dismay increased and Allen felt a sudden wave of sleepiness.  Shooting him the mental equivalent of the finger, Allen left to meet Wisely at the gate.

Allen felt definitively out of place, and the ball hadn't even begun yet.  Wisely was less than reassuring, and had informed him that he'd make sure all of his conversation was appropriate before it even left his mouth.  He'd also received a three second crash course on Portuguese etiquette, which was summed up simply as "Address all of them as Dom, and even if you aren't a Catholic, say grace at dinner if you don't want the worst headache of your life."

Allen wasn't a Catholic, and at this point was uncertain of God in general, but Wisely had managed to restore his fear of the almighty.  

As people began to arrive, Wisely introduced him in smooth Portuguese with a light British accent.  His manner changed with every guest, and Allen supposed he was acting based on whatever thoughts he was listening to.  Finally, the procession of Dukes, Marquisates and Counts came to an end, and they were permitted to retreat up to the balcony and watch the festivities.  Allen tugged uncomfortably at his collar as he sat, while Wisely almost collapsed into the chair next to him.

"Are you alright?  The night's only started, unfortunately."  Wisely asked.  Allen glanced over and laughed.  They were alone, and Wisely had slipped off the scarf he wore to cover the demon eye.

"Are you okay?  You look bloody exhausted!"  He returned and Wisely groaned in answer.

"I don't speak Portuguese, so I have to read all these pricks' thoughts to imitate the language.  Furthermore, in order to make a good impression as Dom Kamelot's new adopted son, I have to listen even closer than normal.  I'll be fine in a few minutes, but it's a bloody pain."  Wisely sighed as Allen watched the demon eye blink closed.  Wisely rolled his shoulders and shifted in discomfort, and Allen blinked as an urge he was certain wasn't his stole over him.

_"What?  The demon eye always causes migraines in the host.  That always helped before."  Neah said, apparently unbothered by Allen's scandalized thoughts._

_"I don't know how to do that!"  He argued back._

_"Whatever.  It would be inconvenient if we got attacked right now with him like that so I'll tell you what to do."   Neah replied._

_"As always, your generosity is astounding.  And why in the bloody hell would we get attacked anyway?"_

_"Well, Dezaisu will be around here somewhere, so..."_

_"You mean Sheril.  Alright, I'm convinced."_

Strangely, Allen didn't feel as awkward as he should when he stood and moved behind Wisely, who turned to look at him in surprise.  Allen shrugged helplessly 

"Neah said this would help?"  He offered, and Wisely smiled in gratitude, slipping off his suit jacket. 

“Yeah, Neah used to be good at that.  Tyki’s probably better, though.  Oh, don’t like that, Neah?  Jealous, perhaps?”  Wisely teased, and Allen grimaced.  It was still strange to hear someone responding to Neah’s thoughts.  “…I don’t think hosting Noah’s pleasure really counts as an ‘unfair advantage’, but whatever helps you sleep at night.”  Wisely shrugged as Neah fumed.

Distracted by Neah’s jealous (?) anger, Allen almost missed the fact that Wisely had now slipped off his shirt and was sitting in front of him shirtless. 

_“Duh, how else are you going to get the dark matter into him?  You wanna waste energy trying to penetrate clothes as well?”  Neah sniped._

_“…please don’t say ‘penetrate’.”  Allen requested._

Wisely laughed, rolling his shoulders back as Allen reached down, tentatively.  Neah’s muscle memory was enough to guide him as he gripped Wisely’s shoulders, digging his thumbs in just to the sides of his neck and rubbing, Neah’s dark matter moving sluggishly out through his fingers and leaving bruise-like marks on Wisely’s skin.  Wisely sighed, and Allen saw the bruises bloom out as Wisely let himself slip into his black form.  Allen had slipped off his non-sealing glove and could see his own nails and fingers turning a similar colour.  Slowly, Allen’s hands moved upwards, rubbing at Wisely’s skull letting more dark matter seep into his skin.  Neah had initially told him where to massage and how hard to grip, but eventually fell silent as Wisely let his body relax.  Allen felt oddly gratified at the clear gratitude radiating off of the Noah.

“Is this normal, for the demon eye?”  He asked.

“Hmm?  Ah, it is.  Although the migraines are a pain, it’s better than some of the other side effects that we Noah can get, though.” Wisely said.

“Side effects?”  Allen responded in surprise.

“Neah would know, so I might as well tell you anyway.  Raasura, who you might have met as Skinn Bolic, probably has it the worst.  His hosts tend to get lost in Noah’s memories too easily, so they get killed quickly when they succumb to instinct.  Bondomu typically drives their hosts insane due to the partial merger of their psyches.  Jasdevi are probably the sanest of his past choices, since they were twins anyway.  Road’s real body is permanently comatose.  The others all have similar problems.  Hosting a Noah tends to put a lot of strain on human bodies, basically.”  Wisely shrugged.  “Not much we can do about it, though.” 

“Suppose not.  Even before I found out about Neah, I was told I’d probably die before I turn 40 just because of my innocence.”  Allen confessed.  Wisely nodded.

“You didn’t mind too much then, though.” He observed, and Allen blinked. 

“Yeah…I guess I didn’t.” He acknowledged.

The two settled back into a comfortable silence until Wisely’s eyes opened again with a muttered curse.

“Bloody _Mikk_.” He growled.  “Of all the _bleeding_ people.” Wisely groaned in frustration as Allen started.

“Is he here?”  He asked in surprise.

“Been here for fifteen minutes, and of _course_ he would start chatting up _Dom Saldanha_ of all people.”  Wisely sighed in frustration and made to stand, only to sway and almost fall.  Allen steadied him and sat him down again.

“Do you want me to go…?”  He asked, uncertain of exactly what he should be doing.

Wisely nodded gratefully.  “If you could just distract him, that’ll probably be fine.  We think Dom Saldanha is involved in a certain group that are experimenting with the occult.  If he notices Tyki’s stigmata…”  Wisely shrugged.  “You get it?”  He asked.  Allen got it.

“He’s down at the bar, you’ll find him.”  Wisely said with confidence Allen didn’t quite feel.

Allen sighed.  _Bloody Mikk_ was right. 

_“Aren’t you only annoyed because he’s chatting up another noble?” Neah suggested._

_“No.  Fuck off.”_

Quickly, Allen descended the spiral staircase at the back of the balcony and found himself in a hallway.  Following the sounds of the orchestra, he quickly made it back to the dancefloor.  The bar was at the end of the floor opposite to the raised stage where the orchestra played, and Allen moved quickly around the edge, passing nobles in varying stages of sobriety, all chattering in quick Portuguese.  Finally, Allen found himself at the bar.  There were tables spread out around it facing the dancers and musicians, but Allen easily found Tyki leaning against the bar, gesturing gracefully and purring something quiet in Portuguese.  The man Allen guessed was Dom Saldanha leaned in, smiling and reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind Tyki’s ear. 

_“You’re certain there’s no jealousy?”  Neah inquired._

_“Fuck off.”_

Luckily, Allen had been raised by Cross, so he knew both how to behave in bars and how to pick up people of any gender.  Unluckily, he’d been raised by Cross, but he supposed the knowledge would finally be useful.  Wonderful.  Such happy memories fresh in his mind, Allen fought hard and put on a smile that he supposed was seductive and sat down on the seat next to Mikk.

Maybe it was the bizarre second sense that the Noah seemed to have for one another, but Tyki broke off from his conversation almost immediately and turned to introduce Allen to “My _dear_ friend, Julio”, before turning to explain to Dom Saldanha that Allen was a Brit who spoke not a word of Portuguese.  Saldanha turned to take in Allen, and Allen was struck by the man’s features almost immediately.  Dark brown eyes with thick lashes, darker hair tied back in a short ponytail and a graceful manner of movement.  His hair was straight and fine, the opposite of Tyki’s wild mess, and his nails were well-manicured.  He shook Allen’s hand and introduced himself in a charming, thick accent that seemed like a more precise, careful version of the way Tyki sometimes spoke.  Allen shook the hand, firmly, and greeted Saldanha in return.

“My name is Allen Walker, as Mi- rather, as Mr. Mikk said, I am British.  The Kamelot family have been kind enough to look after me for my stay here, as I am acquainted with Miss. Road.”  Allen smiled winningly, cover story he and Wisely had worked out running through his mind.  Tyki grinned. 

“Pleasure, Mr. Walker.”  Saldanha replied, returning his smile and motioning for the bartender.  Allen caught only the word _porto_ in his brief command, and the barman quickly provided Allen with a glass of what Mikk and Saldanha were drinking.  Carefully, Allen took a small sip and registered the burn of alcohol, far stronger than in typical wine. 

Saldanha’s English was quite good, and the three quickly settled into a natural conversation about the party, Saldanha and Tyki cheerfully discussing the gossip surrounding some of the guests.  Allen smiled and laughed obligingly, Neah remaining mercifully silent.  Finally, a break came and Allen made eye contact with Tyki.  Tyki seemed to sense his intention and attempted to look away, but Allen was on a mission.

“Oh, that reminds me, you’ve been asked by your family to come up to the balcony for some matter, Mr. Mikk.”  Allen said sweetly.  Tyki looked utterly dismayed.

“Is that…right now, Allen?” He almost whined.  Allen nodded.  With a deep sigh, Tyki stood and swept his hand through the pieces of hair that had come loose from his own ponytail. 

“My apologies, Julio.  Some other time, perhaps?”  Tyki actually _winked_.  Allen almost retched.  Worse still, Saldanha _winked back_.

“It would be my pleasure to take you on a tour of the Saldanha estate any time, Tyki.  The same goes to you too, of course, Mr. Walker.”  Saldanha raised his glass.  “To what should I dedicate this toast, friend?”  He asked Tyki.  Tyki considered briefly, and then smirked.

“To our beautiful country, of course.  May Mr. Walker grow to find the same pleasure in it as we do!”  He purred, with a wink at Allen, who raised his glass and toasted with the two men. 

“If I may accompany you, _Mr. Mikk_?”  Allen asked.  Tyki held out his arm, which Allen ignored, and the two stood.  Mikk and Saldanha kissed in that European way common to men of nobility, and Allen swiftly hauled him off to Wisely.

They had only just gotten into the stairwell when Tyki turned to him, a clear look of displeasure on his face.  Allen had a sense Neah was rolling his eyes.

“It’s not too late to go back, boy.  Julio liked you, so perhaps if you are interested…?”  Tyki smiled.  Allen imagined that was his attempt at seductive.

“I am _not_ having a threesome with you and some shady nobleman, Mikk-prick.  Wisely expressly told me _not_ to let you have sex with Saldanha, you bloody idiot.”  Allen sighed in frustration as Mikk shot him a scheming look.

“Why would my dear nephew say anything like that, boy?  Sounds rather like something a jealous type might come up with, hmm?”  Mikk smiled, arms widening in a magnanimous gesture.  “Of course, there is _more_ than enough of me to go around, dear boy.”  He finished, voice husky.  Allen stared for a few seconds, then recovered.

“As a matter of fact, that is _not_ the case, Mikk.  Saldanha’s involved in some sort of occultist type group, and it seems that there’s a concern that if you were in an…intimate type position with him, he might notice your stigmata or some other indication of your _lack of humanity_ , not to mention your lack of sense.”  Allen folded his arms in disgust as Mikk actually seemed to contemplate that.

“Huh.  Saldanha’s into the occult?  Well, he always was an ambitious, curious type.”  Mikk shrugged in a ‘what can you do?’ way and began bounding back up the steps again.  “Were we going to see Wisely, then?”  He asked, and Allen nodded the affirmative and followed him back up to the balcony.

Road had joined Wisely on the balcony, and the two turned to greet Allen and Mikk.  A few steps behind them, giving Allen a wave of shivers at the realisation that the man was a _ghost_ , was Sheril, whom Road happily grabbed in a hug.  Sheril cooed and lifted her onto his shoulders “So she can see the view better” his cheeks suspiciously pink. 

“Wisely, where is the date I instructed you to bring?  And why is the British boy here?” He asked in disdain at Allen’s very existence.

“Ah, well, that is the thing Father.  You never specified that the date had to be female, so I simply brought Allen.  Is that…a problem?”  Wisely asked.  Sheril’s light blush had deepened to a dark flush.  A flush, Allen wagered, of rage.  Oops.

“I suppose that you were…perfectly within your…rights.  Yes.”  Sheril choked out.  “That being said, I believe _Mr. Walker_ is looking a bit tired, perhaps?  Maybe my dear, loose brother would like to accompany him _back to the arc, hmm?_ ”  Sheril’s left eye twitched slightly.  Road giggled. 

“I suppose that would be fine, since I’ve already left everyone of _interest_.”  Tyki muttered the last bit in a deeply bitter tone.  Allen blushed slightly.  Was this what Lavi had once called… ‘cockblocking’?

Road opened a gate obligingly, and Sheril waved goodbye with a slightly manic look on his face as Tyki sighed and brought Allen through the gate.  Wisely flashed him a peace sign behind Sheril’s back, and Allen smirked and replied by bringing his index finger to meet his thumb, winking at Sheril’s scandalised expression before the gate closed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the late update guys, but the chapter's a bit longer this time so hopefully that makes up for it!!


	7. Taking the Mikky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure if Americans (whom I presume make up most of the readership on AO3) know the phrase 'taking the micky', but it's basically a British/Australian way of saying 'taking the piss'. It's also a brilliant pun in this case, and my way of saying that this chapter has very little plot relevance. If you're not into smut, feel free to skip the majority of it! If you're like the rest of us filth, enjoy!

"Well, boy, since both of our evenings have come to premature ends, it's only fair that _you_ entertain me instead." Tyki declared after the gate closed. Allen blinked. He'd actually been hoping Tyki would go back to the party so he could secretly return his (apparently abhorrently expensive) hair products. Of course Mikk would thwart his plans. Of course.

"I suppose so, Mikk." Allen replied.  
"Please, call me Tyki." Came the knee-jerk response, and Tyki cheerily linked arms with Allen and led him on the strangest possible route to his floor. Allen almost puked multiple times as they passed through walls and floors indiscriminately, and all the while Mikk was whistling some devilishly jaunty tune.

Allen was 80% certain that Mikk passed through half of the solid surfaces purely out of spite. Stomach churning, Allen stood carefully motionless as Tyki let go of him, smirked (the bastard) and wandered through yet wall into another room. Allen heard the clink of glass as Mikk called out to him.  
"Convenient, right?" He asked cheerily.  
" _Brilliant_. I think I'll ruin your carpet as thanks." Allen answered.  
Mikk's head ducked through through the wall, apparently concerned about the state of the carpet. Taking in Allen's slowly recovering complexion though, he just laughed and returned to whatever he was doing before.  
"Shall we save ruining my carpet for later, perhaps?" He chuckled. Allen sighed. The man was hopeless.

Tyki reappeared through the wall with two bottles of some unidentifiable red liquid and a deck of cards. Allen felt himself drool a little at the prospect of beating Mikk again. Neah laughed, but Allen's focus was absolute.  
Ok, so Mikk had brought him into his room and was dealing cards onto the centre of the very large, luxurious bed and giving him a heavy lidded stare. Allen's focus was still absolute.

_Prick thinks he can distract me? As if I would fall for that!_

Two could play at that game, Allen thought with a smirk. Confidently, he sat on the bed and with a sleepy sigh loosened his own tie, unbuttoning his top button and (mostly) keeping the evil out of the smile he sent at Tyki, who grinned and finished dealing.

"If hold 'em is fine with you, boy?" He asked. Allen grinned. Hold 'em was more than fine.  
"If you think you can beat me, sure." He replied. Mikk mock-winced and laughed.  
"Let's play a clean game this time then, shall we? Neah should be able to tell you if I'm cheating...and I don't think you _can_ cheat, can you?" Tyki asked, and Allen glared. Bastard.  
"Not like I'd need to, _Mikk_." He answered. Tyki shrugged, infuriatingly calm.  
"You have no money, so I suppose we'll play for clothes again. Not that it's a problem, since you're so confident anyway?" Tyki asked sweetly. Allen flushed.  
"Of course not!" He bit out.

And so the first hand was dealt. Allen stared in frank disgust at his hand. A two and a seven of different suits. Brilliant. Tyki looked far too smug.

"I'll bet one article of clothing." Allen said with confidence. Tyki smiled. "I'll raise you to two." He said, and Allen accepted. The next three cards were another seven, a three and a five. Allen maintained his smile with easy composure. Mikk's brow creased, and Allen smelled blood.

"Another piece of clothing, Mikk?" He purred. Mikk grinned and nodded, dealing the final card. An ace of diamonds. Allen mentally breathed out in relief. The next round of betting had them both calling, and Mikk dealt the last card of the five they'd be playing with. A two. Allen hummed contentedly, feeling almost bad for Mikk, who looked genuinely devastated.  
"Since it's only the first round, I'll only bet one more piece of clothing, hmm?" Allen smirked. Mikk shot him a look of despair, but grudgingly accepted. The two laid out their cards. Allen stared in confusion.

"Ah, two pair! Nice work, boy. Unfortunately, not enough to beat me..." Mikk sighed in uncharacteristically honest dismay as he laid down his own two cards. An ace and a seven, Mikk's two pair beat his.  
"Why are you so upset?" Allen spat out as he pulled away his tie, shoes and right glove.  
"This tie is really uncomfortable. As are these shoes." Mikk shrugged. Allen wanted to scream. It was only the first round.

  
This time he was dealing, at least. Allen dealt the first two cards out with practiced motions. It was strange not having Tim to, ah...help...him, but Allen wasn't bad at cards on his own anyway. Unfortunately, it looked like Mikk was a fair hand as well. Allen had assumed he was dependent on his group of thugs, but the bastard's posture was far too relaxed and confident.

Allen checked his cards and relaxed. A one-eyed jack (they always reminded him of Lavi) and a King. Excellent.

"Well, Mikk?" Allen asked, keeping his tone carefully neutral. Mikk grinned. "Two items, boy?" Allen nodded and dealt the next cards. He managed to bet Mikk up to 5 items of clothing before the two laid out their cards.

"Straight, Mikk." Allen called triumphantly. Tyki snickered. "Good to see _something_ straight here." He winked. Allen looked at him in horror as he laid out his own hand. "You have...what, an ace of hearts?" Allen asked. Mikk grinned. "A losing hand! You should have asked for more, boy. Or did you think I had something?" He asked in mocking curiosity. Allen gritted his teeth in frustration. He'd thought Mikk had at least three of a kind. This was...well. At least he'd won. Mikk tugged away his tie, shoes and gloves with an expression of deep smugness. Allen caught his eyes drifting to the stigmata on Tyki's throat, and forced his eyes back to the bastard's face before handing over the cards. Mikk's fingers brushed against the back of his good hand in a way that could have been accidental, but Allen suspected was not. Mainly because Mikk had the nerve to wink at him. Who the hell winks anyway?

 _"I wink. Maybe that's what you've done wrong, kid. No winking. That's why you're not getting laid...either that or your personality!" Neah filled in helpfully. Allen didn't bother to acknowledge him_.

Mikk set his own cards down with exceeding care to stop Allen from sneaking a peak and reached to grab one of his bottles. Uncorking it with ease, he took a deep slug and passed the bottle to Allen.

"What the hell is this stuff, Mikk?" He asked with deep suspicion.  
"Kamelot reserve, actually. Fine stuff. I swiped it from Sheryl's cellar." Tyki looked far too pleased. Allen sniffed it before taking a drink as well. Tyki grinned and dealt out the first three cards. The two passed the bottle around while they played until Allen swallowed the last drops, and Mikk was sitting comfortably in nothing but his trousers and with his hair still tied back. Allen had lost his own hair tie, jacket, vest and socks but was otherwise clothed.

Mikk and Allen both stared at the other bottle. Their cheeks were slightly flushed, but neither would say they were drunk. Instead, the spicy, rich flavour of the port clung to their tongues, and an easy sense of relaxation had taken hold. Tyki sighed, and put the bottle away. For later, he consoled Allen who had discovered he quite liked the flavour of 'Kamelot Reserve'. Allen dealt out the next set of cards, and the two bet high on the round. Allen had a hard time concentrating, admittedly, with Tyki shirtless, but his hand was good. They'd bet another three items of clothing, with Mikk protesting in a way that sounded a little bit too much like subtle encouragement that he only had three more clothes. Finally, they laid out hands and both stared in surprise.

"We both have...the same two pairs? Seriously?" Allen asked.  
"Huh. Guess we'll have to..." Mikk furrowed his brow, a move that was bizarrely endearing. Mikk leaned forward in thought, and Allen swallowed as his muscles flexed with the movement.  
"We could both strip?" Allen found himself offering, smiling. Mikk grinned.  
"We could, or..." And for the first time, Neah's voice (which was in the process of vigorously objecting to that proposal) was drowned out entirely as Allen leaned closer to Mikk over the cards and reached out to his hair tie, tugging the thin ribbon loose. Mikk sighed, so soft he could barely hear it, and emboldened, Allen tugged his head closer, Mikk's eyes going half-mast as he brought him into a kiss. It started sweet, the flavour of the port giving way to tobacco and a darker taste of spice, smoke and the flavour of poppy seeds. Allen groaned as Mikk pulled him closer, cards scattering as Allen started unbuttoning his shirt, pulling it off roughly. Mikk broke the kiss, bending to trail kisses down Allen's neck, leaving a bruise on his collar bone as Allen pulled at Tyki's hair, eliciting moans from the other man.

Allen pushed Tyki back and he easily fell into a half reclined position, looking up at Allen with dark eyes and slightly uneven breaths. Allen could see the beginnings of a bulge in Tyki's pants and let his eyes linger before sitting back on his heels.

"So? Don't you know that spades are high? I win, so strip." He ordered. Tyki grinned. "With pleasure." He murmured, using his ability to let his clothing fall right through his own body so he was lying on top of them. Allen took a breath and a moment to appreciate the sight before him- Mikk, utterly nude and shameless despite his increasingly obvious erection. Brilliant. Then Tyki took a breath and Allen shook out of his trance and straddled him, Tyki's hands moving immediately to his pants. Allen slapped them away with a low laugh and ground down against Tyki, who arched his back and moaned in eager response. The lighting in Tyki's room was dark enough for it not to be obvious, and out of bizarre curiosity Allen ran his hand through Tyki hair, pulling back the strands that hid his stigmata. Rather than barely-there scars, they'd darkened to the black of a fresh tattoo. Tyki'd fallen into his black form. Allen kissed the stigmata on his throat, letting his teeth graze it. Tyki choked and bucked up against him, so Allen bit down in earnest, sucking a bruise on his throat as Tyki let out an incoherent exclamation in what Allen assumed was Portuguese.

Finally, Allen unbuttoned his own pants and slipped them and his underwear off. Tyki was panting and flushed beneath him, and staring at his now naked body with something like rapture. Allen smiled, unusually genuinely, and let Tyki kiss him with surprising gentleness before Allen took Tyki's now hard dick in his hand and stroked it with a teasingly loose grip. Tyki moaned into his mouth and pulled away, stretching to get his hand inside one of the bedside tables and pulling out a small vial of some scented oil.

"Do you want this, or should I...?" Tyki asked, voice unsteady.  
"I'll take it, shall I?" Allen said, and Tyki handed him the vial. Allen let a small amount of the stuff cost his fingers before curling in slightly and reaching down, slowly pressing his first finger inside himself. Tyki reached down and gently stroked Allen to distract him from the discomfort which was...unexpectedly caring. Allen smirked. How cute, from the normally intimidating Noah...if Central saw this... Well. If Central saw this, Allen would probably be hunted with significantly more effort. The thought kind of turned him on, honestly.

Relaxed now, Allen slid his second and third fingers in as began to stretch himself while Tyki continued to stroke him. It wasn't long before stretching turned into blatant finger-fucking and Allen was thrusting upwards into Tyki's hand. Regaining some semblance of self-control, Allen pulled his fingers out and moved to position himself over Tyki. Carefully, he took first Tyki's tip, earning more Portuguese curses, before bringing himself down roughly onto the rest of him. Tyki let out a wordless cry of pleasure, and the two paused to get used to the new sensations. Tyki reached for Allen's good hand, bringing it up to his mouth and cleaning his fingers with his tongue, taking half his hand into his mouth and sucking it in the most vulgar way possible. Allen groaned at the sight and feeling, finally unable to stop himself from moving on top of Tyki. Tyki's hips moved with Allen, thrusting up to meet him as he ground and moved up and down on Tyki's dick, shifting the angle until- there, that place that made his vision go white and sent shocks up his spine. Allen cried out as he found it, and Tyki moaned as Allen tightened around him in response. Both of their movements grew rougher, and Allen found himself moaning and cursing with Tyki, finally finding the bastard's name echoing out of his mouth with every other movement until finally, Tyki yelled Allen's name as Allen brought himself down onto Tyki with particular roughness. Allen sighed as Tyki came, repeating his name like a breathless curse and a prayer until he finished. Allen rolled off of Tyki and pushed himself up into a sitting position,

Tyki moving immediately to lie between his legs, sending him one smouldering look before taking Allen's now agonizingly aroused dick in his mouth. Allen gasped in ecstasy as Tyki's head bobbed up and down on him, sucking with prodigious skill and enthusiasm. One of Tyki's hands rubbed at his balls gently, in sharp contrast to the aggressive movements of his tongue, while the other held him up so that he wasn't flat on the bed. Allen's gloved hand found itself knotted in Tyki's hair, and Allen groaned in desire as Tyki came off of his dick, running the tip of his tongue up the shaft and giving Allen an excellent look at his face in the process. He almost came just from the sight of Tyki, hair disheveled, face flushed, eyes glittering, lips slightly swollen and bruised and pulled into an honest, post-orgasm smile of happiness. When Tyki took him back in his mouth and Allen felt his head brush against the back of his throat, he really did come. Yanking Tyki down a little bit harder, Allen cried out his name and came into his mouth. Tyki hummed around his dick as swallowed eagerly, waiting for Allen to finish before rolling onto his back, legs half-hanging off of the edge of the bed.

The two laid like that for a few minutes before Tyki got up, wandering through objects and walls before returning with a damp cloth, having already cleaned himself in the bathroom. Allen raised a hand somewhat weakly and caught the lightly tossed rag, cleaning himself quickly. Usually, he felt embarrassed about this, but with Tyki he felt strangely at ease. When he finished, he threw it into a dirty clothing basket in the corner of the room. 

Tyki pulled back the sheets, and Allen put away his old reservations- that this was an enemy, a servant of the Earl, a man who had moved beyond both labels and was increasingly thwarting Allen's desire to dislike him, or at least feel ambivalent about him, and simply fell asleep next to Tyki. The Noah extinguished the lights and laid next to him, covering both of them with the luxurious sheets and wondering why, despite all reason he felt so compelled to take Allen in his arms. Most of all, he wondered why he felt such a desire to be not, as Joyd wanted, to be at the Fourteenth's side, but at Allen's. Finally, Neah wondered whether Road would find out about this (she would) and what the hell she'd do when she found out that not only wasn't Allen a virgin (he hadn't been for quite a while) but that he had just fucked the brains out of her adoptive uncle. All three fell asleep with smiles and a rare sense of peace.


	8. Settle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who says romance is dead? Probably anyone raised by Cross, but that doesn't make it true!

Allen sighed, shifting closer to the warmth at his side, eyes still closed and brain fuzzy. The scent of tobacco, wine and a light musk reminded him, however, of last night...as did a slight discomfort in his rear.

 _"I still can't believe you slept with Joyd. You better hope that bastard never takes over his host, because we will never hear the end of it. And by the end of it, I mean the end of the propositions that will no doubt follow this." Neah sighed in dismay._  
"Oh, are you saying you thought I was so good he won't be able to leave me alone? What a compliment, oh invasive spirit." Allen snarked back.  
"You only day this because the only time you've dealt with Joyd was when he was innocence-mad and insane. He's much more of a pain when he's sober and in control of the host, I can assure you." Neah complained.  
"Your strange baggage has nothing to do with who I sleep with, thank you very much. Especially since I'm generous enough to allow you to...cavort in my dreams." Allen muttered with great bitterness.  
"You don't allow it, you can't stop it. But nice try. And be grateful it is only in your dreams. For now. Anyway, I suppose it doesn't matter since I'll massacre all of them for good once I take over...so sleep with whoever you want, kiddo. Just know that I'll be here. Judging." Neah smirked.  
"Judging what? I think last night was at least an eight or nine out of ten, if not a ten out of ten." Allen grinned happily.  
Neah sulked. "You would. That's only because you don't know Joyd. Let's hope you never do."

Allen opened his eyes and grinned. Tyki was passed out with his head on Allen's chest. The two of them were both still naked, and Allen smiled wider as Tyki shifted so his head was tucked under Allen's chin. He let his right arm stretch out to embrace Tyki, absently stroking his rough hair with his left. Tyki made a happy sounding sleepy noise as Allen tugged gently at the knots in his coarse hair.

"Hm...Allen...?" Tyki murmured in an adorably drowsy manner. Allen chuckled softly, the movement of his chest prompting Tyki to raise his head and open his eyes. Tyki grinned.  
"Huh...almost thought that was a dream, boy. Guess I won after all!" Tyki said in happy triumph. Allen's eyes widened. "Won? You were in your underwear!" Allen cried.   
"Oh, you didn't realise that was deliberate, boy?" Tyki smirked. Allen blinked, remembered and...oh. That would make more sense. Then...  
"Mikk, you _bastard_! We'll have to have a rematch, then!" Allen exclaimed with a bit of joy at the prospect. Milk raises a hand to his head and shot Allen a sleepy finger gun. "All part of my master plan, boy!" He claimed. The reality was that he was mostly flying by the seat of his pants, but that wasn't as cool, so he didn't say it. It was at that moment, with Allen giving him the world's cutest glare and Tyki running his hand through his hair and laughing sweetly, a feeling of utter happiness in the air, that the hair on the back of his neck stood up.

He didn't even have time to curse before Road came skipping into his room.

Allen stared at her in surprise and some small amount of horror. Tyki assumed his own expression was much the same, minus the surprise. Road had a way of turning up in moments like this, it seemed. Better than the alternative, he comforted himself- the Earl had a similar characteristic.

"Tyki-pon...this isn't fair! Why didn't you invite me?" She whined. Tyki opened his mouth to answer, but Allen beat him to the punch.  
"Well, _you_ never invite me to your soirées with _my_ Noah, so it wouldn't be very fair for Tyki to have to invite you to our evening, would it?" He replied with perfect serenity. Tyki blinked. Wait a second, Road and the 14th were...? The idea did have a sense of familiarity to it, which Tyki had learned to associate with his semi-repressed Noah memories, but...well. It would be good if no one mentioned this to Sheril. Road pouted.  
"You're such a poor sport, Allen!" She exclaimed in half sincere frustration, before spinning on her heel and strutting out the door...much to Tyki's relief.  
"So, before my least favourite niece interrupted, where were we..?" Tyki began, only for Allen to laugh and shut him up with a kiss.

* * *

 

"You were right." Road muttered grudgingly to Wisely, handing over the money to her smirking, so-called brother. Wisely grinned in triumph.  
"You shouldn't underestimate the depths of our uncle's depravity!" He exclaimed cheerfully, before wiggling his fingers in the classic 'give me' motion. Road pouted. Wisely's fingers moved more aggressively, and she sighed and with bitterness that threatened to give Wisely a serious headache, handed over Allen's hair ribbon. Not that Wisely wanted a personal item of Allen's in order to enhance his powers in relation to the boy or anything, he just liked seeing Road's face when she had to give it up.   
"Oh, this wasn't part of the bet, but thank you for that as well! I very much enjoyed it!" Wisely exclaimed happily. Road glared.   
"You were supposed to be jealous, Dumbely!" She exclaimed. Wisely grinned serenely, although a vein was pulsing somewhere in his skull.   
"I'm not a jealous type, sorry." He said cheerfully, the memory Road had just summoned up as an apparent act of vengeance of Allen's lips, taste and hands replaying on a loop in his mind. Quickly, he turned his mind to other things as she summoned up a demonic grin that promised nightmares for a week and hopped onto Lero, flying away without further comment. Wisely grinned, put the money and ribbon in his pocket and went to go make some tea and sit in front of the fire in the hopes of soothing his headache.

Undortunately, his human body had a tendency to react rather unpleasantly to the lifestyle changes he'd made after he took it over, so while his headaches were better in this form- that is, the brain squeezing, can't think and can't move headaches brought on by overusing his ability, staying in human form wasn't entirely ideal either. Wisely groaned, finally alone as he sipped at the tea and stared at the flames. His hands still shook on occasion when he relaxed enough to slip back into his human form, and he'd taken to filling his glasses only three-quarters full out of habit as a result. Setting down the mug, he grabbed a rug and heavy blanket from the nearby couch and reclined on his back, using the blanket to prop himself up, slightly, waiting for the tremor to relax before he picked up the drink again.

Almost in a trance of relaxation and warmth, Wisely didn't even notice Allen until the boy dropped down beside him with his own cup of tea.

"You're not in your Noah form?" Allen observed in surprise. Wisely shrugged.  
"My headaches are better like this." He said, noting Allen's eyes being drawn to the slight shake in his fingers.  
"Cross looked like that, once, when we were in one of the Arabian countries. Apparently the religion they follow doesn't permit alcohol...although my master decided to cope by taking up smoking something strange to cope instead, his hands used to shake like that as well." Allen looked at the fire thoughtfully. "I think it was called a...nargle? Nurgle? Huh, I can't remember now." He muttered. Wisely paused for a moment, looking down at his hands in irritation.  
"It seems that the street orphan who used to use this body had an alcohol problem, and despite my taking over the body, it is still physically addicted to the stuff. Inconvenient, but I'm sure it will disappear as I take greater control." He explained. Allen nodded.  
"How surprising...Noah possession really is strange!" He exclaimed. Wisely glared.  
"Oi, you're the weirdest one here!" Wisely countered. Allen blushed lightly.  
"Ahhh...I suppose you're right." Allen laughed and leaned back, his hair brushing Wisely's ear. Wisely pretended he didn't notice, despite the pale cheeks of his human body going slightly pink.   
"Oh, incidentally, how much did you win from Road?" Allen asked cheerfully. Wisely's light flush became a deep blush.   
"...you knew about that? Oh...you saw her counting out money as she left, and heard her cursing me under her breath...wow, you're entirely correct that she bet that she'd sleep with you first. Did you know she tried to convince me that sleeping with Neah counted as well?" Wisely laughed, desperately playing off his embarrassment. Allen just smirked.  
"You know, you could use that money for a good cause." He offered. Wisely looked at him suspiciously before all of his eyes widened slightly.   
"Oh, that is a good cause. Well, Sheril's not much of a philanthropist by nature, Tyki's a shameless degenerate with no financial sense and Road is clinically addicted to candy...thus, the responsibility to give back comes down to me!" Wisely's grin matched Allen's, and Allen leaned closer to him.   
"Brilliant! If Road can open a door at, say, 7:00pm for...Marseilles?" Allen suggested. Wisely pretended to consider it for a brief moment before agreeing.   
"Why Marseilles?" He asked in slight surprise.  
"Ah well...I know a brilliant chef there who owes me from a card game. Even if the Order is there, she won't sell us out!" He said cheerfully. Wisely shrugged. Made sense.

Wisely nodded and stood, finishing his drink. "I'll see you there, then. Oh, and make sure you put Tyki's hair stuff back...he always gets difficult when he has a bad hair day, seriously...". Wisely shuddered and waved as he left to find Road.

* * *

 

Tyki Mikk, nobleman, superhuman and damn good card player, was not impressed. Somewhere, Wisely was no doubt shuddering from the killing intent radiating off of him. More specifically, radiating off of his hair. Although Tyki didn't really bother much with his Noah form's hair since it was now ridiculously long, coarse and unmanageable, his original form's hair was a different matter. He set oil in it every night to maintain its luxurious softness and shine, washed it with premium soap and, importantly, used only the finest wax to brush it back in a style that he considered deeply attractive. Additionally, Sheril made no secret of his dislike for Tyki's hairstyle, which had made Tyki even more fastidious and obsessive about it. So, to find his precious wax gone was simply unacceptable. He'd have to go out in public to buy more, but if he did that he'd almost certainly run into Sheril or one of the various people he either slept with or wanted to sleep with. The odds of this were higher than one might think, mainly because Tyki wanted to sleep with or had slept with most of Portugal's high society, a habit that both disgusted his brother and brought himself and Joyd a reasonable amount of fun. All in all, two birds with one stone.

All that aside, it was clear to Tyki that buying more product was a venture fraught with risk, even for him. Sending an akuma to do it would have been an option had the Earl not sent the majority of them out on various tasks, leaving only the useless ones free. Tyki paced across his roof in frustration, considering his options and finally settled on the least abhorrent means of settling all of this. He hated being disloyal to the usual shop, but some things, it seemed, couldn't be avoided.

A few hours later, dressed and with his shorter, human hair falling about his face in a manner that was distinctly annoying, he found the Earl, who immediately laughed at him and suggested he simply borrow one of his distinct, "extremely cool and hip, nowadays" hats. Tyki politely declined and stepped through the gate instead.

* * *

 

Allen was having an excellent time putting off his responsibilities and concerns in a charming restaurant on the Marseilles beachfront, eating mussles and fries with Wisely, who had a surprising amount of hilarious stories about Road and Neah in their previous lives. Wisely privately considered it vengeance for his last violent and painful death at Neah's hands, and based on the throbbing rage and embarrassment that was not Allen's coming out of Allen's head, balanced with a pleasant hint of murderous intent, he felt he was succeeding in his petty mission. It was only when he felt the distinct mental edge of another Noah nearby that he broke off explaining the time that the Earl had found Neah dressed only in a set of car ears and a tail tied to Road's bed and frowned.  
Allen leaned in closer, eager for more salacious details despite Neah's increasingly disturbing and detailed threats, only for Wisely to mutter a curse.

"Bloody...Tyki is here? Why...? Seriously...?" He exclaimed before clapping a hand over his mouth to hold in laughter.   
"Wait, Mikk is here? Why?" Allen hissed, looking around furtively.  
"He's buying wax for his hair, apparently this is where some nobleman that Tyki slept with gets his and...he's going to get a sample to make himself presentable and then...seriously? He's going to go back to Lisbon to buy his normal stuff. Sheril must give him too much money." Wisely rolled his eyes. Allen blushed. This was technically his fault.  
"Ah...in that case, should we leave?" He asked.  
"No! If he sees us like this, he'll be too embarrassed by his hair and won't acknowledge it. He's more afraid of us than we are of him. Actually, it'd be pretty funny to sneak up on him...". Allen's eyes lit up.  
"Wisely...that's brilliant! Let's do it, where is he?" He asked eagerly.

Wisely dropped some money and a healthy tip at the table and gestured for Allen to follow him, the two taking to the alleyways and stalking Mikk for a block before the crowd thickened enough that they could approach him from behind. Slowly, like assassins, they wove through the crowd, Mikk's fancy clothes and distinctly smooth walk marking him out. Finally, Allen got to within a metre of him, almost close enough to touch and made his move, leaping forward to touch Mikk's shoulder- only to overbalanced and fall directly through him. Mikk cheerfully let his foot rest on Allen's collarbone and laughed, although Allen could see some embarrassment on his face. The two burst into laughter almost immediately though as Wisely followed Allen and fell directly through Mikk's torso, a look of horror on his face as he landed on top of Allen, face hitting Allen's chest with a thump. Annoyed, Wisely turned to look at Mikk.

"You bastard...what was so interesting about those damned birds that you couldn't focus on reality or the fact that you made yourself bloody incorporeal?" Wisely cursed and Allen felt himself go into hysterics.  
"Huh, well, I had a thought a while back that the birds were almost as nice to watch as my Teez...and if anyone could read my thoughts and found only that I was distracted by birds, they might become careless! Seems I was right, boy?" Tyki purred. Allen choked at the look of frustrated irritation on Wisely's face. He could feel him twitching and cleared his throat pointedly. Wisely looked turned to look at him again and registered Allen's thoughts, smirked and leaned back, shifting his weight to sit harder on Allen's stomach. Allen went somewhat pink. Tyki winked and stepped over them, turning to look back.  
"Well, I shall leave you two to it, then! Have an excellent evening, Wisely, boy.  Oh, and if you ever mention my hair being like this to anyone in Lisbon, Wisely, I'll tell Sheril about this little date of yours!" Tyki hummed to himself and melted back into the crowd.

Wisely stood and offered a hand to Allen, who took it with some gratitude and looked around the crowd. Wisely laughed at him. "None of the others will be here, Tyki just has a gift for abhorrent timing. He even walked in on Sheril and the Earl once by accident...although I think he ended up traumatised from it. Allen blinked.  
"Sheril and the...Earl? The Millenium Earl, that is? Isn't Sheril...well...?" Allen tried and failed to find the words.  
"Well, he is married, yes. And he does...maintain the marriage. Unfortunately, he's not particularly sensitive about my ability so I am also rather traumatised. As for Road, well...it is creepy, but Road is quite independent, so in the end it amounts to simply creepiness with no basis, luckily for myself." Wisely shuddered at the thought.  
"That is an...image...". Allen felt his (delicious, amazing) dinner returning to life inside his stomach.  
"Ah. Well, Sheril's like that with most people, so don't worry about it too much!" Wisely said, and took Allen's hand. "I just learned about a place around here from one of the local's minds, can I show you?" He asked Allen in apparent excitement. Allen felt his heart pick up slightly at the sweet look on Wisely's face, and nodded.

Wisely led him through the crowd, dodging people with grace Allen normally saw as unique to pickpockets as they raced the sunset to get to Wisely's discovery. They were near the centre of the city now, further from the beach and amongst the oldest buildings, church steeples pointing towards the heavens that were surely the destination of their worshippers. Allen felt somewhat out of place here, being raised by a heathen like Cross and having no memory of even being baptised. Neah laughed at him.

"You don't even believe in the lord and saviour you're supposed to be serving, kid?" He asked.

Allen didn't respond and let wisely bring him to the foot of a church with the highest steeple in the square.

"Can you climb?" He asked breathlessly, and Allen understood.   
"Of course. I used to be an acrobat." He bragged, stretching his arms in preparation. Wisely smiled.   
"You really were, huh? Wow! The crowds were impressed but...your hair was red?" He exclaimed in surprise. "Like Cross'! It suited you, but I like the white as well." Wisely murmured, and Allen blinked. Oh yeah, mind reading. Wisely laughed at him and jumped up to grab a window sill, and Allen followed him up. The two clambered up the side of the church until Allen reached the roof and leaned down to hoist Wisely the rest of the way, the two collapsing and clinging to the shingles, panting. Once they caught their breaths, they made their way up further to the apex of the pitched rooftop and sat on the stone that defined its spine. The sun had just set as they climbed, and the sky was darkening quickly. A cool breeze blew across the rooftop, and the first stars became visible. The lights of fires and lanterns kept the streets below bright enough to see houses and the occasional movement in the shadows, and the noise of the people in the evening softened with their height from a din into a slow rising and falling of sound. Allen breathed out, taking in the view and the few fading waves still visible on the swiftly darkening beach.

"It was an elderly couple, who were thinking of this place. I suppose they used to sit up here sometimes in their youth...the thoughts of peasants can be sweet as well, I suppose." Wisely murmured.  
"Don't let Sheril hear you praising the peasants." Allen laughed. Their voices were low, the air above the church seeming almost more sacred than anything Allen had ever bore witness to inside one.  
"My uncle has some sympathy somewhere, I'm sure." Wisely said, although his tone was doubtful enough to inspire giggled from both of them. The two watched the stars and the bright, full moon in silence, leaning against each other's sides. Allen turned his head slightly, looking at Wisely's profile set against the night sky and the city. He wanted to say-  
"That this suits me, huh? I suppose the person this body used to belong to did things like this.  And...perhaps I did lie to you, earlier." Wisely said.  
"I thought that was cliché, and I didn't see any elderly couples in that crowd." Allen breathed.  
"The boy...climbed buildings like this in London to look for rich in the crowds or unattended food, but he also loved the height and the view. I saw this church in the minds of a few locals." Wisely shrugged. "I guess it's difficult to entirely suppress the original consciousness." He admitted.  
Allen felt a strange warmth suffuse him and reached up to touch Wisely's face, which had turned to look at the streets below and brought it to face him. Wisely's eyes widened, reading his intent, and the two leaned in and kissed together, holding each other close to fend off the cold air of the night.


	9. In Your Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief interlude chapter that I wrote while procrastinating studying for exams, yay!! My last one is tomorrow, though, so updates should be more regular from now on! May the gods of essays smile upon me and may you enjoy this chapter!

The two stayed together for a while, enjoying the other's warmth and taste on the rooftop until finally, Wisely checked his pocket watch and saw that it was close to the time he'd asked Road to open a gate. They leapt off the rooftop and wandered to the agreed upon location, holding hands and letting their shoulders brush together from time to time. When they stepped through the gate, Road was waiting. As was, much to Allen's amusement, a smirking Mikk who shot them both the thumbs-up and then walked away, whistling something that sounded suspiciously like 'here comes the bride'. Road pouted at the site of them together.

"Seriously, Allen, when are you taking me out for dinner? I was your first kiss, wasn't I?" She asked petulantly. Allen blinked.  
"Oh...Road...did you think you were my first?" He asked, surprised. Road flushed.  
"I wasn't? Oh, now you've made me sad...you should really do something to cheer me up, Allen...". Road pouted. It was...maybe a little bit cute.

_"You know, I can think of a few ways we could do that...it would be much funnier than sleeping with bloody Joyd of all people!" Neah sung in his head._

Wisely choked back laughter as Allen responded with a mental tirade centring around his absolute refusal to ever, ever have whatever twisted version of a threesome that would be with the man living inside my bloody head. Road, apparently guessing what he was thinking, sighed.

"Tyki led me to believe you were much more adventurous...although he and Neah never got along anyway, even if he doesn't remember it." And with that heartfelt statement of disappointment, Road spun on Lero and flew away at a leisurely pace.

_"You know, every time you have sex it is technically a threesome. Since I am always here. Unfortunately." Neah groused.  
"Can you please just shut up? Please?" Allen asked._

"Wow...we're both going to have nightmares for at least a week!" Wisely said, with a note of respect in his voice, and, if Allen wasn't dreaming already, enthusiasm.   
"You don't sound worried?" He remarked. Wisely blinked and laughed.  
"Well...Road's nightmares are always an experience when she tailor-makes them for you. When I first woke this time, I experienced a lot of the ones she gave Tyki and the twins by accident. I'm almost immune!" He said proudly. Allen paled at the 'almost'.  
"That's...unfortunate." Allen said. Sleep had never felt so terrifying.  
"They're quite something...if you sleep with me, I can help, though." Wisely offered. Allen recalled the look in Road's eyes- classic murderous child with an axe to grind.  
"Well, if you're offering..." Allen winked. Wisely winked back and the two dissolved into laughter, Wisely taking his hand and leading him to his quarters.

Allen thought he'd have a hard time sleeping (and Neah contributed an immature snicker at that choice of wording) but he passed out next to Wisely almost immediately, the two lying close enough to feel the other's body heat but not quite close enough to feel anything else beyond the pressure of Wisely's hand on Allen's. Then he was dreaming, with Neah still resentfully conscious in the background of his mind.

_Allen's dreams were, as usual, bizarre and disjointed. A trail of associations, wandering ideas and muted colours punctuated by the rare crystallised scene. Narrative that made no sense, characters who didn't belong...Neah had never had the experience of watching another person's dreams before, but Wisely's previous incarnation had once described them to him as something like this, so Neah supposed his weird little vessel was normal. The material and 'plot', though, was more eccentric than usual tonight so far. He'd already sat through four or so sex dreams featuring bloody Joyd of all people, which was disgusting. Then there had been the usual few embellished memories of the Black Order Escapades, as Neah thought of them. One very cute rehash of Allen kissing Wisely, and a series of snippets of vague, uninteresting and dull memories of the day. And of course, those few scenes with any sort of coherence were rare. Dreams, Neah had found, were generally utterly incomprehensible, the screenwriter illiterate and the director strung out on opium, or something of the sort. So, when Road finally began to interfere, Neah was rather grateful for the shake up of routine._

_Allen's consciousness was sluggish, but responded slightly to her subtle sparks of energy, until finally the kid's consciousness was closer to waking than sleeping. When he was on the cusp of realising that he was dreaming, Road began to work. As a neutral outsider, Neah was fascinated. Dreams were Road's world, where she was God and Satan at the same time. She murmured suggestions, ideas into Allen's dream, with his own mind reacting in an utterly unguarded manner. From there, she could measure responses, determine weaknesses and associations and how to interfere. Common fears were nothing, Neah noted proudly: heights, spiders, snakes, clowns, Jack the Ripper and Dracula...Allen responded either favourably or neutrally to all of them. Finally, Road struck gold._

_"A dog is to your left." She suggested. Allen in the dream turned and so there was, a ragged mutt. Tail wagging and head cocked to one side, its eyes glistening and fixed on Allen. And then Neah felt something shudder, a tremor before an earthquake. Unnerved, Neah concentrated, listening to the sounds of Allen's deeper consciousness._

Dog. Allen. Cold. Snow. Stripes. Canvas. Rope.

_Neah felt a chill as the snow tore through the dream._

Shit.

_Neah ran to Allen, Cursing under his breath and holding him from behind.  In Allen's dreams, Neah was just as capable of spinning the narrative as she was, and so he began a new plot.  One that didn't make sense, but no dream ever made sense so he wouldn't think about it too deeply._

_"The dog is named Lavi. It has red hair and an eyepatch...and next to it is a cat, with black hair...named Kanda...and Lenalee is holding them both...Komui's newest potion's gone wrong, Allen, you need to find Reever." He murmured, watching as Allen reacted. The boy stiffened, his eyes moving to the side where a cat had indeed appeared, and Lenalee was swimming  
Into focus as Allen's mind processed Neah's suggestion._

_"What are you doing?" Road asked, and Neah found her sitting on his shoulders. He turned up to face her.  
"Stopping that line of thought. I have to sit through this brat's traumatised childhood memories often enough as it is, Road." He explained lightly._   
_"Oh, is poor Neah bored with his vessel? Just go to sleep, let me play a bit longer." She sang. Neah could feel his eyelids dropping in response._   
_"Hmm...Road, I don't want to sleep. I slept for over a decade, you might remember." He complained. She smirked and rolled her eyes.  
"If you've seen this so often, just ignore it and let me have fun, hm? Or...could it be that mass-murdering Neah caught feelings for his body?" She teased. Neah rolled his own eyes._   
_"How many years, Road? I thought we all agreed that feelings weren't something we Noah could be ruled by." He laughed. Ridiculous, feelings towards a meat suit he just happened to be wearing. As if.  
"Well, if you're so very bored, perhaps we could play a different game...or not. Spoilsport. Go to sleep, Neah, he's about to wake up anyway." Road pouted._   
_"Sure, babe." He laughed, wandering back out of Allen's dreams and back to his own place as the boy in question began to stir._

"Allen...she's here, or was." Wisely yawned, stroking Allen's hair as Allen woke.  
"Mm...Wisely. Sweet of you." Allen sighed, rolling over to face him and pressing a sleepy kiss to Wisely's forehead. Wisely blushed sweetly, embracing Allen and kissing him back, the two cuddling closer.  
"She's not mad anymore...lucky. Road's like Tyki, I suppose." Wisely remarked. Allen nodded.  
"Capricious, huh? And you're not?" Allen asked. Wisely laughed quietly.  
"Maybe a bit. Not like them, though. It's difficult not to be when you've lived this long." Wisely said. Allen nodded.  
"Sheril isn't, though." He pointed out. Wisely considered.  
"He's single minded. That's his human side, though. Dezaisu just enflames the host's own desires, and Sheril's ambitions were already fixed. In a host with no ideals, no focus...his influence leads to insanity quickly." Wisely murmured.   
"And you? How much of you is Wisely, and how much is Noah?" Allen asked. Wisely frowned.  
"You're new, so you don't know, but that's rather _personal_...however, I'll do my best to explain. Wisely is my Noah name, so I am the consciousness of the first Wisely, _Noah's_ Wisely. That being said...we cannot entirely escape our hosts, it seems. Some things change, habits, tastes, and the memories of the host influence our own opinions and values. My personality, though, is mine, as it always has been." Wisely yawned and pulled Allen closer.  
"Sleepy?" Allen asked. Wisely nodded, yawning again.   
"Go to bed, you're tired as well. I can feel it, idiot. And...thank you." Wisely whispered, resting his head on Allen's chest and breathing out, eyes drifting shut.  
"For what?" Allen asked, whispering as well.  
"I don't...for your interest, I suppose. Or maybe your existence...it's not often we think about ourselves. Perhaps we should, more." Wisely sighed, almost asleep now. Allen nodded, running his hands through Wisely's hair until they both fell asleep.


	10. Right, so a Brit and a Frenchwoman walk into an Australian tavern-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sounds like the beginning of a joke, is pretty much the beginning of a joke-\\_:)_/-

Wisely’s eyes twitched behind closed eyelids, and his mouth curved into a small smile as he woke.  Allen’s dreams were something he was aware of, and his own subconscious had a tendency to draw inspiration from surrounding thoughts when crafting his own dreams.  Now that he was awake, though, Allen’s dreams were separated from his own thoughts.  Most people’s dreams were entertaining, although some were to be avoided.  The Earl’s, for example, on the rare occasion that he slept were incomprehensible to the point of madness.  Lulu’s tended to be alien as well, thanks to her tendency to spend most of her time in non-human form, and Road’s were inaccessible to him entirely.  Jasdero and Devit shared dreams when they slept, and they were wild and insane and he experienced them in an eerie sort of double-timber, like two voices at once with only the barest sliver of delay.  They always gave him a headache as a result.  Allen’s were pleasant, something rare.  Too often the dreams of others were too overwhelming, or too boring, or too nonsensical…incompatible with anyone but their rightful owners, he supposed.  Tyki’s wouldn’t be bad either, if they weren’t so...Tyki-ish. 

 

“Wisely!  What was my favourite nephew thinking just then about his favourite uncle?”  Tyki cried, waking up Allen and making Wisely jump almost a foot in the air as said uncle walked _far too nonchalantly_ through the headboard of his bed and cheerfully pushed Wisely to the side and sat between the two of them. 

“How did you know I was thinking of you?”  Wisely asked, unnerved.

“Your left eyebrow tends to twitch when you think about me!”  Tyki explained.  Go figure. 

“Bloody hell…what are you doing here, _Mikk_?”  Allen muttered, eyes opening with obvious reluctance. 

“Why, I’m just checking up on my brother’s adopted child, third in line for the great Kamelot fortune!”  Tyki said, grinning.  Wisely rolled his eyes. 

“What’s the point in Sheril even having a will when no one wants to inherit his bloody estate anyway?”  Wisely asked.  Tyki shrugged. 

“So I can liquefy all of it and gamble in luxury all across the world?”  Tyki suggested.  Wisely snorted.

“Make sure you gamble against me first, if that happens.  I could use some spending money.”  Allen smiled, leaning against Tyki.

“Oh, very cute, you _cheat_ , thinking you can take the Kamelot fortune from me!  You’re the last on the list, just after Marian Cross.”  Tyki said.  Allen blinked.

“Why would you want to gamble against Cross more than me?  I’m better company _and_ I happen to know that Cross’ net worth is in negative numbers.”  Allen argued.

“Because Cross isn’t as good at cheating as you are _and_ I can outdrink him and will win as a result.”  Tyki explained smugly.  Allen raised an eyebrow at the notion of Tyki, who had minimal body fat and couldn’t possibly have accumulated the necessary drinking experience to match Cross in his twenty-some years of life. 

“He doesn’t mean he’d win _fairly_.  Incorporeal cheating prick.”  Wisely laughed.  Tyki shrugged.  “There are no laws on drinking.  If everything I drink ends up under the floorboards of the establishment, it’s really generous on my part.  I’m paying the fee but giving them back their product unsullied.”  Tyki smiled, content.  “Yeah, come to think of it, I’m a really great person!  Woulnd’t you say, boy?”  He asked.  Allen couldn’t choke back laughter.  Tyki frowned.  He half felt like giving the kid’s heart a good squeeze, but decided that it might be a bit too soon to start messing with his internal organs after the last time he’d done so in a rare moment of self-awareness and tact.  Wisely, apparently noting his thought shot him the thumbs down behind Allen’s back.  How helpful. 

“Anyway, aren’t you here for a real reason Tyki?  You were thinking about something the Earl asked you to do when you got here.”  Wisely pointed out.  Tyki sighed.

“Yeah, he wants someone inconspicuous to go and check out a piece of innocence.  I said that Lulu was the obvious choice, which he agreed with, but then he said that you’re surprisingly stealthy, which is true.  Unfortunately.  I rather wanted to go myself, actually, so enjoy it.”  Tyki sounded deeply disappointed.  Allen suddenly felt concerned as to where he was being sent.

“You have to meet her at the gates in…an hour?  Tyki, you prick, you’re giving me a headache.”  Wisely groused.  Tyki shrugged. 

“Just because my thoughts are too much for your tiny mind to deal with, doesn’t mean you get to complain all the time.  Go steal some of Sheril’s wine, it will improve your headache.”  Tyki suggested.

“You’re only saying that because you think it’ll piss of Sheril.  How _loving_ of you, uncle.”  Wisely laughed. 

Allen rolled his eyes at both of them and got up.  Wisely blinked, focus momentarily broken at the sight of Allen in his underwear walking to grab clothes that had been neatly folded over a chair last night.  Tyki sighed and leaned against Wisely.  Unfortunately, the feeling of Tyki’s shoulder against his own was enough to bring back his focus, and his unpleasant awareness of his so-called uncle’s thoughts.  They mostly consisted of a reasonably detailed monologue, which, to be fair, Wisely’s thoughts had headed in a similar direction, but that didn’t stop him from pushing Tyki off of himself and telling him to _get your bloody head out of the gutter_.  Tyki pouted, much to Wisely’s disgust. 

 

Allen waved goodbye to both of them after getting dressed.  Stepping out of Wisely’s quarters, he quickly made his way to the gates where a cat was napping in a patch of sunlight.  If Allen hadn’t seen that particular cat so many times before and learned his lesson, he might have tried to scratch it behind the ears.  As if sensing that impulse, the cat yawned and stretched, twitching its ears and fixing him with an inviting look.  Allen stared at the cat.  His fingers twitched, but he resisted its obvious desire.  The cat rolled its eyes, twitching its tail and stretching before picking itself up and, somehow in that process, turning back into Lulu Bell.  Allen’s stomach turned at watching the transformation, but he kept his face neutral as Lulu smiled, her pupils finally dilating back to proper circles. 

“Tyki found you, then?”  She asked, stretching again and yawning.  Transfixed by her movements, Allen nodded.  “Good.  We’re heading to Australia…Sydney specifically.  The Earl thinks that there’s a piece of innocence there.  If we find one, we’ll let him know.  _D’accord?_ ”  She asked, smiling. 

“Sure.  Why did Tyki want to go to Australia, of all places?”  Allen asked, surprised.

“Oh, he thinks the Australians are even more prone to reckless gambling that the British.  I told him that was unlikely, but he remained uncharacteristically steadfast on that point.”  Lulu explained, before turning to the gate.  Road, or rather, the doll of Road waved its floppy hand from atop the doorway before opening the gate.  Allen winced as a dry heat blew from outside of the gate.  Lulu stepped into the gate without bothering to check for him, and Allen quickly followed, if for no other reason than curiosity about the continent.

 

Australia met him with a hot, humid blast to the face…and the hair.  Allen grimaced as he stepped into the bright sunlight, something that made his British eyes ache.  He and Lulu had stepped into an alley in the centre of the city, and the few drunks that were around ignored them as they stepped seemingly out of the brick wall of a building.  Allen ran a hand through his hair in dismay as they stepped out into the light proper.  Lulu leaned down to whisper to him.

“As you know, this is a British colony.  You’ll do the talking, cher?”  She murmured, a hint of sarcasm in the last word.  Allen nodded.  Lulu’s French accent wasn’t likely to win them much for favours here.

“What are we looking for, exactly then?”  He asked.  Lulu rolled her eyes. 

“That’s our job to find out.  You hunted innocence with the Order, just do that.”  She said.  Allen nodded and walked back into the alley.

“’Ello mate, could you point me to the nearest tavern?”  He asked, smiling at the least inebriated of the bunch. 

“You new to Sydney, lad?  Look across the bloody street, there’s one right there.  Good luck to ya with yer lady friend!”  The man exclaimed with a hint of bitterness.  Lulu giggled.  Allen nodded thanks and turned to leave.

“Oi, lad, aren’t you gonna reward a poor sod such as myself for ‘elping you out?  A ha’penny is all I ask…or I’ll split yer cute mug in half.”  The man murmured.  Allen stiffened, realising he’d crept up on him from behind.  His British currency was stashed elsewhere to boot, but Allen didn’t think no was an answer in this scenario.  Allen moved to take off his gloves, looking down, but by the time he had brought his hands together he heard the man curse weakly and the heavy thud of his body hitting the ground.  Looking up in shock, Allen just caught Lulu’s face shifting back to its normal configuration.

 

“What did you do?”  He asked, surprised.  Lulu laughed.

“Superstition is rife in this era.  Show someone the face of the devil, and they tend to react in that manner.  A useful talent, I would say.”  She said, keeping her voice low.  Allen blinked.  That would be convenient. 

“Cross had a similar talent, actually, but he was generally too drunk to bother.”  Allen remarked, remembering the expression his master had given him upon presenting him with that _bloody carnivorous plant_ all those years ago.  Lulu giggled, trying to keep her voice down and looked out of the alley again.  She seemed to be watching the women, and Allen watched her, fascinated as she began to change her features.  Hair lightened, face grew lined, weathered, eyes lightened to a clear grey.  Her clothes changed to match the style of the colonists, but in a slightly faded manner.  Her skin tanned to the barest degree, and lips thinned.  She turned to him and smiled. 

“Now I fit in more than you, hm?  I can’t change my accent, but you can change your clothes at least.”  She suggested.  Allen looked at the less than hygienic individual behind him.  His skin crawled.

“Five minutes?”  He requested.  Lulu nodded.

 

Allen tugged off his gloves and activated his innocence, waiting for a lone man to walk by.  Luckily, one was approaching at that very moment.  Crown Clown’s clown belt grabbed him, pulling him into the alley immediately and silencing him at the same time.  Allen cheerfully held the man immobile with Crown Clown and stripped him down, leaving the man in his underclothes and appropriating his workman’s gear for himself.  Nodding his thanks, he leaned into the man’s face.

“You saw nothing.  Take that other guy’s clothes and his stolen money and get out of here.  Tell anyone, and I’ll take more than your clothes, got it?”  Allen asked.  The terrified man nodded.  Allen smelled urine and dropped the poor guy, who immediately began undressing the first man with shaking hands.  Lulu nodded, expression cool.  Allen felt like she was impressed.  He was going to tell himself that because he liked it, and Lulu’s face was so inscrutable that he couldn’t be proven wrong. 

“To the tavern, then?”  He asked.  She nodded in assent, and offered her arm.  Allen took it obligingly and the two ventured out onto the street.

 

In the end, they went to several taverns before they found any significant lead.  Lulu wasn’t complaining at all, probably because her shoes were ones that she’d custom made using her own ability, but Allen was dying.  The heat was unbearable, and the poor workman’s clothes were becoming steadily soaked with sweat.  The guy’s feet were bigger than his as well, and he was confident he’d have more blister than foot by the time this was over with.  Lulu seemed to be enjoying the heat.  Allen hated that almost as much as he hated catching sight of his now thoroughly fluffy hair in any given reflective surface.  His eyes seemed to be drawn to it the way some people were drawn to an automobile accident.  In a way, he supposed it was a similar situation.  His normally fair skin had also taken on a tomato-esque hue, to the point that the last tavern they had been to had refused him service.  That could be owed in part to the limp that he’d taken on from the accursed footwear he’d…acquired, he supposed.  Not that it made it _better_.  He’d only wanted to buy a bit of water _anyway_.

 

He had seen several Australians gambling in the various establishments and was prepared to lend a bit of credibility to Tyki’s theory.  Shame he was too busy _dying_ to join in.  Lulu seemed somehow entertained by his state, which was just bloody lovely of her.  Really made the whole experience more enjoyable.  Allen hoped never to return to Australia ever again, and made a note that its original existence as a penal colony was far more appropriate than he had ever realised.  This place truly felt like punishment.  Shame most of the people who wound up there were mainly bread thieves. 

 

Actually, Allen was starting to think that stealing a loaf of bread was a rather appealing idea.  His stomach growled, loudly, and he was unable to stop himself from sending a pleading look Lulu’s way.  She sighed.  Allen prayed. 

 

“You want to get some food?  There’s another tavern ahead.”  She offered.

“Do you have any money?”  He asked, almost breathless with excitement.

“No.  Go win some from some of those idle fools gambling in the corners of all of these places and buy what you like.”  She suggested.  Allen smiled.  That, he could do.

 

Upon entering the next place, Allen sighed loudly, brushing against a drunk older man staggering out of the bar.  Neatly swiping his wallet, Allen took the few coins remaining and sat to join the fellows in the corner.  He wondered, briefly, why they always seemed to appear in the corners.  Why not gamble openly, with pride?  Neatly, Allen negotiated a seat at the next hand, and five hands later had enough to buy a reasonable meal.  Luckily, Tyki’s gambler’s instinct had been, so to speak, on the money.  Allen was at best a reasonably skilled player without Timcampy to help him out, but not exactly the world’s premier poker master.  These men, however, were indeed fast and loose with their betting.  Allen’s stomach had quieted, as if in anticipation of what was to come.  Ten hands after that, Allen had amassed a sizable pile.  _Almost_ enough for the meal he and his stomach had been dreaming of.  Confident he could have the others down to their last coins in another ten hands, he was preparing for the long haul when Lulu, who had been sitting nearby, walked up behind him and leaned down to whisper in his ear.

 

“We are trying to stay inconspicuous, of course.”  She said, a hint of exasperation in her voice.  Allen’s recently recovered complexion flushed once more.

“Of course,” He said, barely able to keep the irony out of his voice, “wouldn’t want things to take a turn for the worse, after all.  Gentlemen.”  He nodded, taking his coins and heading up to the counter to buy as many steaks as he could afford.

 

In total, he could afford five steaks and a salad.  He offered Lulu the salad, but she took one of his steaks instead.  He felt like arguing, but she fixed him with an expression that made him think better of it.  With dignity, Allen quickly finished the salad before breaking into the steaks, finishing everything before Lulu finished her single steak.

“How impressive.  You have talent after all, Allen.”  Lulu acknowledged, solemnly.

“I do, don’t I?” Allen agreed, satisfied.  He couldn’t stop his eyes from wandering to the third of so of steak Lulu still had on her plate.  Her eyes flashed, and he looked away with some regret and waited politely for her to finish.

 

“Hey, kid, if you’ve got any winnings to spend, you’d be best to go down to the track.  Big race today, I hear.”  One of the men Allen had been gambling with before said.  He had surprising cheer given the money he’d lost.  Allen looked up, surprised.

“Yeah?  Who would you bet on?”  He asked, intrigued.

“That would have to be the bay, the _Mr. Harbourside Estate_.  That horse has been having a rough go of it, but, well, I shouldn’t say why exactly, but that would be the horse to bet on.  If I told you anything more, it would be trouble for me, but trust me.  Everyone thinks that the race’ll go to the roan, _Shortening Bill_ , but they’re dreaming.”  The man said confidently, and clapped Allen on the shoulder.  Lulu shrugged.  And so, the two got directions and headed to the race track.

 

The horses were just lining up as they arrived, and it was too late to place bets (much to Allen’s dismay).  Elbowing their way to a point where they could see after stealing into the grounds, the two watched intently. 

The bay that had been recommended was lagging behind initially, overtaken by another roan named _Fish and Chipswitch_ , and an unusually muscular looking horse with the name _Bernardinito_.  It seemed to be held back by a large horse named _National Joys_ that was just ahead of it.  _Shortening Bill_ was indeed, in the lead.  The last horse in the race, _Rich Dear Natalie_ was, from Allen’s amateur eye, probably the horse he would have bet on- it had excellent tone, a competent jockey and general good air about it, but horse racing is an unpredictable and often unfair business.  Just as the horses entered the last lap, however, something strange happened.  _Shortening Bill_ suddenly slowed, and the _Mr Harbourside Estate_ leapt ahead, surging forward in a shocking burst of speed.  In fact, all of the horses ahead of _Mr Harbourside Estate_ seemed as though they’d encountered some sort of inexplicable problem, faltering just briefly enough to fall behind.  _Rich Dear Natalie_ , which had pulled up some slack in the previous lap, was just able to take advantage of the other horses’ difficulty and make it into third after _Shortening Bill_ in second and _Mr Harbourside Estate_ in first.  Allen watched carefully as the horses stopped and were led off the track.  All of the horses that had been ahead of _Mr Harbourside Estate_ seemed to have very slightly altered gaits compared to when they had been led on, not quite limps but some slight anomaly.  Allen turned to Lulu, only to see that she was watching with laser-like focus.  Allen had been dragged to enough horse races by Cross to have the barest experience with them, luckily, or he wouldn’t have even noticed the difference.

 

“You see that?”  Lulu asked, voice hushed.

“Their walk?”  Allen asked.  Lulu nodded.

“Not just that.  Their tracks are too dark, as though the ah…what is the word, horse feet?  They seem to be bleeding.”  She whispered.  Allen blinked and looked carefully at Lulu’s face.  Her eyes were inhuman, and he realised she’d changed them to some creature with superior eyesight.  Useful.

“That could be it, then?” He asked.  She nodded. 

“This should be enough for now.  Road will open a gate for us.”  Lulu said, a note of cheer in her voice.  Allen sighed in relief, and the two turned to return to the alley they’d came from when Allen felt his legs buckle.  Confused, he tried to stand, but found himself getting dizzy.  The heat, which had felt oppressive before was now almost unbearable.  He hadn’t noticed it during the excitement of the race, but his head was aching, a sense of building pressure bringing him to his knees.  Lulu just caught him before he fell face first onto the pavement, alarm clear on her face.

“Allen, how much water have you drank?”  She asked, crouching beside him.

“Ah…a glass?”  Allen asked, uncertain.  Lulu did not seem impressed.

“You’re British.  _Merde_ , I saw people like you in the south of France in the summer.  Sunstroke.”  She said, and rolled her eyes.  Allen blinked, ready to defend the honour of the British people before his vision fell out of focus.  Swooning into Lulu’s arms, he let her half carry him to a shaded area.  Further away from people, she returned to her normal form and sighed, apparently considering.

“Try to stay conscious for this.” She advised, before taking on the form of a saddled horse.  Generously, she bent her knees for him and Allen just managed to get himself onto her back, grabbing at her mane and collapsing on top of her. 

 

When they stepped into the gate, Allen felt himself starting to come back as someone brought him a glass of water and he felt cool air again.  Pulling himself into a sitting position, Allen could feel his vision and focus return.  Looking up at the person holding the water to his mouth, he smiled. 

“Thank you, Lulu Bell.”  He said, gratefully.  She nodded, a somewhat stoic expression on her face. 

“He’s alright, right?  Do we need to get a doctor?  Sheril knows a man in Portugal who can treat”- Tyki’s somewhat frantic question was quickly cut off by Allen’s laughter at him, and Tyki glared.

“You looked like you were on the verge of death, boy.  And trust me, I know _exactly_ the way you look on the verge of death.  This was remarkably similar.”  Tyki huffed.  Allen choked on the water, coughing it up and laughing.  Lulu’s soft laugh broke though both of them though, and Tyki turned in surprise to look at her.  She’d put her sunglasses back on, but Allen hadn’t seen a sincere smile like this one on her before.  It looked…nice. He liked it.  Lulu kept laughing, quietly, and handed Allen the water to hold himself.  Leaning down, she pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and turned to leave.

“Keep an eye on him, Tyki, but if he swoons again water should be fine.  No wine for a few hours.”  She said, the barest traces of mirth still audible in her voice.  Tyki nodded, still surprised.

“Huh.  Lulu likes you.” He said to Allen.  Allen laughed.

“Well, who _doesn’t_ like pale British men who can’t handle the heat?” He asked, teasing.  Tyki grinned.

“Jasdevi, actually.  They feel they’ve been ignored.”  He said, happily.  Allen blanched, and Tyki quickly grabbed the water, apparently in fear that Allen was going to pass out again.

“I will…say hello to them…tomorrow?”  Allen offered.  Tyki nodded. 

“That’s the spirit, boy!”  He exclaimed, before grabbing Allen and hoisting him up on his feet again.  “Now, you must tell me about Australia!”  He cried, eyes flashing with delight.  Allen laughed as the two made their way back to one of their quarters’- whose they would end up in was as of yet uncertain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AO3 preserved my italics when I pasted this in!!!! I don't think it used to do that before and I am ECSTATIC!!  
> Also, apologies on the wait!! It's been kind of a wild summer and I just moved into uni like, literally last week so things have been hectic with me BUT *hopefully* things will be more regular from now on!


	11. Grin and Bear It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Allen's decision making capability just keeps on deteriorating!

After Allen had fallen asleep in what was technically his bed, despite the fact that Tyki had attempted a claim of co-ownership since he had used the room as a ‘back-up bedroom’ for the last several years, he was woken early and violently by Jasdevi.  The twins’ gift wasn’t particularly useful for matters of stealth, and neither were their personalities, but they managed to sneak up close enough that they were both able to grab his ears and yank them ludicrously hard, simultaneously.  Allen woke up swearing as the two collapsed in laughter and Tyki, who had spent the night in the bed as well in case Allen had any ‘lingering issues’ from the heatstroke, reflexively decked Jasdero.  His fist went straight through his head, still incorporeal, much to Tyki’s own very vocal dismay.  Allen pretended not to notice Tyki also pulling half of his own body out of the mattress.  He also pretended that it wasn’t weirdly endearing, mostly by commenting loudly and cantankerously on the heat and how _bloody hell, who lit the fireplace in here_. 

 

Oh, Devit had lit the fireplace.  He’d thought it was a bit nippy in their room and didn’t want them to be cold when they woke up.  Or so Devit said, although based on his cheeks, he clearly didn’t find the temperature cold either.  Jasdero, recovering from the shock of Tyki’s fist passing through his head, rolled his eyes at his twin, before the two returned to their primary goal. 

 

“Allen, you don’t spend any time with us anymore!  You have to train with us again today!”  Jasdero ordered, pointing his finger at Allen in what Allen considered to be a truly overdramatic manner.

“Um…  Did the Earl say I have to?”  Allen tried.  Tyki snorted, and Devit pulled a face at both of them.

“That’s irrelevant!  You have to do it!”  Jasdero said, confidently ignoring Tyki’s pointed sigh, as well as the sheet slowly slipping lower, revealing Tyki’s chest and Allen’s shoulders from behind him.  Devit’s face, which had returned to its original colour, slowly began to transition back to red as the sheet slowly drifted lower.  Allen suspected Tyki was doing that intentionally, just to mess with the twins.  Cruel, but effective.

“Can I have…say…fifteen minutes?”  Allen bargained. 

“I was thinking more like…an hour or so?”  Tyki put in, and Allen felt his nerves begin to fray as Tyki shifted just so that his ass was flush to Allen’s hips. 

“Hm..we’ll be back in forty-five minutes, but in exchange, you have to play with us for an extra hour!”  Jasdero proclaimed, grabbing his increasingly embarrassed twin by the arm and half dragging him out of the room.  Allen noticed the sheet had slipped just below Tyki’s navel. 

“Was that a bargaining tactic as well?”  He asked, motioning to the sheet.

“What, my beautiful body?  I can’t exactly avoid it, can I?”  Tyki asked, all sweetness and innocence.  Allen’s skin crawled.  “Devit’s easily embarrassed, right?  It’s kind of cute, if you ignore how scary those two are.”  Tyki continued, deftly avoiding the issue and leaning back against Allen ever so slightly.  Allen’s breath hitched.  “Huh, not the only one easily embarrassed, though…Or, perhaps embarrassed is the wrong word, boy?”  Tyki purred, now blatantly grinding back against Allen’s increasingly aroused body.  Allen groaned, giving up on conversation for a bit.

“Christ, you’re impossible, Mikk.”  He sighed, letting his own hands slide down to grab at Tyki’s hips and pull him closer, rolling the two over so he was laying on top of Tyki, pressing kisses to his neck.  Tyki moaned as Allen spread his legs and pressed his knee up against Tyki’s ass, his kisses trailing lower down Tyki’s back.  Tyki shuddered underneath him, squirming as Allen paused, just to breathe out one hot breath on his tailbone.

“I can’t believe you called _me_ impossible.”  Tyki moaned, and smirked as he pressed kisses lower, letting his lips grow just a little bit slacker, finally pressing one lovely, wet French kiss to Tyki’s asshole.  By this point, both of them were achingly hard and Tyki was barely able to restrain himself from grinding against the mattress.  Allen lifted his hips up, and Tyki neatly brought his knees back under himself. 

“Do you have like-”Allen found his question cut off as Tyki reached into the mattress, feeling around for something, and then pulled a condom and a small pot of oil out from somewhere within it, tossing them at Allen.  “Convenient!  You really are good for all sorts of things, Mikk!”  Allen exclaimed.  Tyki rolled his eyes.

“You’re only just realising that now, boy?  I’m good for _all sorts of things_.”  Tyki replied, and Allen laughed at him, slicking his fingers with the oil and running them down Tyki’s spine, dipping ever so slowly between his cheeks and pressing the very tip of his finger against Tyki’s ass.

“Stop teasing me, you… ugh, what the hell is it in your language… _s_ _á_ _dico sanguin_ _á_ _rio_.”  Tyki complained, only to have his words cut off as Allen pressed his finger in, leaning over Tyki’s back and tugging at his hair with his other hand, pulling Tyki’s head back and sighing into his ear, slowly stretching him all the while.  Finally, when Tyki’s cheeks had reached a feverish hue and his legs were trembling, Allen asked him if he was ready.  Tyki’s reply was fervently in the affirmative, and Allen happily removed his fingers, rolled on the condom and poured a bit of the oil into his palm, stroking himself to spread it around before leaning back over Tyki and pressing up against him, gently at first, slowly pushing harder until Tyki’s ass opened for him and took him in.  Allen felt his own heart racing as he pushed in deeper, until both men were panting.  Allen rested his head against Tyki’s shoulder as the two paused, waiting to adjust, Tyki’s biceps shining from the slight sweat he’d broken in holding himself up on his elbows.  Allen let his tongue flick out to taste, and Tyki practically purred under him.  A few moments later, and Allen leaned back and began to move properly.  Tyki sighed and rocked his hips back, meeting Allen’s movements, twisting his head back to catch Allen’s eyes, winking.  Allen laughed at the sheer corniness of move, before leaning back down to press a kiss to Tyki’s lips, speeding up his movements with careful mind to Tyki’s own stability, since the man was now holding himself up on only one elbow, the other arm having moved so he could stroke himself while Allen thrust into him.  Movements sped up, slowly, then quickly, until Allen felt himself on the edge.  He had barely the reason left to be annoyed that Tyki would outlast him, before his hands came back to Tyki’s hips to pull him tight, orgasming with a moan of pleasure and Tyki’s name wrapped into a single exhalation.  Tyki turned to watch him, lips parted ever so slightly, and Allen thought that the sight would be burned onto the backs of his eyelids, just like the sun.  And Tyki was like the sun, with his strange, light amber eyes that reflected the light like a cat’s when the moment was right, like it was now.  Transfixed, Allen collapsed back onto his heels, pulling out of Tyki, who with easy grace rolled back onto his back, legs still spread wide and groans of pleasure growing louder as he stroked himself, keeping his eyes locked with Allen’s until he came too.  Allen, still catching his breath, found his lips moving on their own as Tyki came back to himself and swung his legs off of the bed, standing with that same easiness that seemed to characterise most of his movements, and offered Allen his hand.

“You’re beautiful, you know, Mikk?”  Allen said, still struck by the moment, and Tyki smiled at him, eyes practically sparkling.

“So I’ve heard.  Did you know you talk in your sleep sometimes, Allen?”  Tyki teased.  Allen rolled his eyes and took his hand, letting Mikk pull him off the bed as the two walked to the shower together.

 

They’d only barely managed to get dressed when Jasdevi reappeared, Jasdero proudly holding a watch.

“Time’s up, Walker!  You’re ours now!”  Jasdero cried, and both twins launched themselves at him in perfect unison.  Unperturbed, Allen stepped quickly behind Tyki, who just laughed as the twins passed straight through his body and grabbed Allen regardless.  Allen stared in shock at Tyki’s back.

“Mikk!  You’ve betrayed me!”  He exclaimed, full of horror.  Tyki spun on his heel to watch him.

“Actually, you’ve betrayed _me_ , boy!  Using me as a human shield!  And after all we’ve been through, too!  You truly are a sadist!”  Tyki countered.  Allen tried to shrug despite the twins’ firm grips on his biceps. 

“Well, I thought you’d be honoured by my placing my trust in you!  I assumed you’d protect me with pride!”  Allen tried.  Tyki snorted.

“I’m a poker player, not a knight.  Try Lulu if you’re after chivalry, she’s certainly the most honourable of us all.”  Tyki laughed, and.  Well.  Allen had to admit that was a fair observation, and simply glared, trying to keep the amusement off of his face as the twins dragged him away.

“I’ll take my vengeance for this, Mikk!”  He proclaimed, wishing he could point at Tyki to emphasise his point.  Alas, his arms were no longer his to control.  Tyki doubled over laughing as the three exited the room.

 

Allen briefly thought he would be saved when they passed Road in the corridor.  Alas, she laughed at him and even followed them for a bit on Lero.  Allen added her name, directly below Tyki’s, to the list of those whom he would take vengeance upon. 

_“You’re out to take vengeance, huh?  Maybe I could_ _…_ _help with that?”  Neah suggested._

_“_ _…_ _Your brand of revenge has a history of being a bit more excessive than what I was thinking, so no.”  Allen replied.  Neah huffed._

_“Please.  You think my playbook begins and ends at mass murder?”  He countered.  Allen considered._

_“Actually, that is exactly what I think.”  He replied.  Neah scowled._

_“I’ll have you know that I am actually a very creative person.  Don’t you remember that time Road and I used_ your _dream to have sex?  That was pretty fucking creative.”  Neah defended himself.  Allen felt his stomach twitch at the memory._

_“That wasn’t even revenge!  What were you taking revenge on me for?  It wasn’t even funny!  Just_ _…_ _depressing and frustrating!  Like you!”  Allen complained.  Neah, apparently annoyed with being called depressing and frustrating, retreated back into the depths of Allen’s mental landscape.  Allen shuddered at the distinct sense of impending doom now emanating from his own bloody head._

Actually, Allen realised, if he wanted to get back at Tyki, at least, he might have lucked out after all.

 

“Hey, Jasdevi, what _are_ your actual plans?  Where are we going, for one?”  Allen asked, regarding the twins with new interest.  The two continued their relentless march onwards.

“Eh, Jasdero, he has a point.  What are our actual plans?  Where are we going?”  Devit asked. 

“What do you mean ‘where are we going’?  You’re the one I’ve been following!”  Jasdero exclaimed.  Both blushed.

“I was following you!”  Devit admitted.

“In that event, could I make a suggestion?”  Allen asked.  The twins considered, before nodding in the affirmative.  “What do you say to messing with Tyki, hm?  I happen to know the location of a certain item…”  Allen began, only to be immediately cut off by Jasdero.

“Not…not his lucky deck of cards?  Or, no, even…could you possibly know the location of his sacred hair gel?”  Jasdero gasped.  Devit’s eyes widened in shock and excitement.  Both dropped his arms and stared at him in awe.  Allen smirked and laughed in a manner eerily reminiscent of Cross, right before he announced a new addition to Allen’s training regimen. 

“In fact, I know the location of both, but the true prize is one that will require all of our efforts.  You see, we aren’t merely going to take these particular items.  No, the plan is far deeper than simply that.”  Allen declared.  The twins practically fell over in amazement.

“Truly…you are formidable, Allen Walker!”  Devit exclaimed.  Jasdero nodded, clearly awed.

 “Anyway, what do we have to do, Allen?  Mikk… as pranksters, it’s our ambition to mess with him.”  Jasdero stated.  Allen’s smile grew wider.

“We’re going for the grand prize, of course.  Here, however, is where things grow tricky.  You two can create almost anything, correct?”  Allen asked.  The twins looked at each other and smirked.

“Care for a demonstration?”  Devit asked.  Before Allen could reply, they both summoned up their signature firearms and pointed them at the ground between the two of them, firing together.  Allen jumped back, taken by surprise, only to find himself blinking in confusion.  The two had summoned up a perfect replica of Allen himself.  It was distinctly eerie.  The creation winked at Allen, took a sloppy bow and promptly exploded into brightly coloured confetti, which disappeared after hitting the floor.

“Hey, wasn’t it an inch or so shorter than I am?”  Allen asked, coming back to himself.  The twins looked at each other in surprise.

“Nope, that was a perfect replica!”  They claimed.  Neah’s voice chimed in to agree that in fact, Allen was exactly that height, before the bastard returned to ignoring Allen again.

“Ah.  Right.  Well, anyway, I’ll explain when we get there.”  Allen suggested.  The two considered briefly.

“Alright, we’ll see.”  They agreed

“Anyway, follow me.”  Allen requested, and cheerfully began to lead the twins back to Mikk’s room.  Tyki had mentioned something about needing to go deal with something or other in Portugal, so Allen suspected his rooms would be vacant.  His instinct was correct, and the three carried out their mission with success.  It was on their retreat back to neutral ground that they ran into trouble.  Jasdero stiffened, and the two exchanged looks just as they were about to exit Mikk’s bedroom.  Allen paused, confused, only to get bodily thrown into a closet by the two twins along with their new creation, and have their hands clapped over his mouth.  Allen struggled instinctively, only for Devit to hiss into his ear to “ _Bloody stop moving, you bastard,_ he’s _coming!_ ”.  Allen, confused as to who ‘he’ was, relaxed and the twins removed their restraints, the three all peering through the crack in the door of the surprisingly roomy and extraordinarily well-stocked closet.  Sheryl entered the room only a few moments later, humming.  Allen swallowed.  Sheryl looked around, briefly, before beginning his task.  Allen watched, in awe, as Sheryl began to pluck small parcels of tobacco, various tokens that seemed to originate from casinos, bottles of spirits and, with a look of true disgust, a stash of pornographic photos from under Tyki’s pillow.  With each item he took, Sheryl pulled a piece of paper from under his arm, scrawled some missive onto it, folded it and replaced it in the hidey hole he’d extracted the item of sin from.  Then, rather than keeping the offending object, he found an entirely new place for it.  The twins’ eyes were almost bulging from their sockets as the three watched a clear master go about his work.  When Sheryl slipped the pornography into Tyki’s rough pile of dirty clothes, the twins seemed to barely be able to restrain themselves from falling out of the closet and shaking Sheryl’s hand, and instead contented themselves with vigorous gesturing and mouthed expressions of appreciation that Allen found himself unable to avoid joining in on. 

_‘Who would have known the prime misery was a prank master?’_

_‘Not I, Jazzy!  Oi, did you just see-‘_

_‘Tobacco in his toothpaste?  Clever!’_

_‘Wait, wait, Mikk has another photo album?’_

_‘Ah, that one only has pictures of himself in it, though.’_

_‘_ _…_ _you two took note of where he stored that one, right?’_

_‘Bloody pervert, Allen.  As if we would.’_

_‘_ _…_ _Actually, I did.’_

_‘Jazzy, you filthy bastard.’_

_‘For blackmailing purposes, I swear!’_

_‘Ah, I forgive you.’_

And so on.  Finally, Sheryl turned to the closet.  Allen felt his skin crawl as Sheryl actually shuddered with disgust at whatever he was imagining was in Mikk’s closet, before finally leaving the room.

 

“How did you two know he was coming?”  Allen asked, impressed.

“Ah, Sherry always smells weird.  Like soap.”  Devit explained, looking repulsed. 

Huh.  Allen couldn’t smell anything, but he’d take their word for it.  The three quickly positioned their replicated items, performed a bit of improvised chemistry that Allen had managed to pick up from Komui and Johnny at some point, and retreated to the common room.  Allen spent two of the most frustrating hours of his life trying to teach the two to play cards, before retreating back to his room to take a nap and hope for the migraine to go away. 

 

_“Oi, Allen, ‘av you got a headache?” Allen heard the echoing voice in his dream.  It was a pretty relaxing dream too, just lying on his back, watching the sunset and most importantly, doing so alone.  Silently, but for the sound of the wind.  Tim was curled on his stomach.  And now, some bizarre British voice of god asking about his head?_

_“Come to think of it, I do now.  Thanks for reminding me.”  He snarked.  The voice laughed._

_“Wake up and I’ll give you a painkiller?”  The voice offered.  Allen blinked._

_“Wisely?  Is that you?  I’ll wake up then, I guess_ _…_ _”._

 

Wisely was sitting cross legged at the foot of his bed with a glass jar of something in his hands.  Allen sat up, sluggishly, and blinked at him. 

“It’s actually a tisane, but I’ll give you some for later if you like.  I have some brewing, if you come with me?”  Wisely offered.  Allen nodded. 

“Thanks!  Where are you going?”  He asked, surprised.  It was getting close to dinner time, he thought.  Wisely shifted, his third eye blinking before resuming its habitual stare. 

“Well, just down to House Kamelot, not too far and dinner’ll be served, very low-key I can promise!”  Wisely chirped. 

“Well, if dinner’s served, I suppose I can’t say no!”  Allen said, feeling remarkably more energetic after the promise of food. 

 

The two strolled in companionable silence until they got to the door.  Road was waiting, not that Allen even saw her until she threw herself at him from a particularly shadowy corner.  Wrapping her arms tight – too tight, really, around his neck, she cooed in his ear.

“Aw, I’ve missed you so much!  I haven’t seen you around at all, Allen!”  She pouted.  Allen laughed.

“Really?  I’ve seen the odd doll around quite a few times.  I’d expect that for every time I notice, there are at least 5 I don’t.”  He pointed out.  Road frowned.

“Actually, it’s more like once every ten times that you notice me!  What’s with that, Allen?  Being that unaware of your surroundings is seriously dangerous, you know?”  She complained.  Allen laughed again.

“What do you think would actually happen if you kill me, anyway?  And I do mean _you_ , other than the Noah, I can’t think of anyone else that would stand a chance at doing the job.”  Allen said.  Road blinked.

“Well, Allen, if we killed you, I guess you’d die, wouldn’t you?”  She said, cheerfully oblivious.  Allen shrugged, and the three stepped through the gate. 

House Kamelot was set at the top of a hill, overlooking the river Tagus that flowed through Lisbon.  Allen was informed by Road that the light he could see on the other side of the river was the _Torre de Bel_ _é_ _m_ , part of the symbolic gateway to the city.  Allen dimly remembered Lisbon from ‘studying’ there with Cross.  Unfortunately, what he remembered of ‘Lisbon’ was primarily Lisbon’s brothels and gambling dens, thanks to his master’s filthy habits and Allen’s efforts to pay the debts that resulted.  He did remember the _Torre_ though, albeit primarily as a landmark he’d used to navigate from one filthy ally to another.  It seemed strange to see Lisbon from the other side of the river, not to mention from an estate.  And indeed, House Kamelot was an estate, much more so than Allen had imagined. 

 

“Mm, it’s something, I suppose.  After as many lifetimes as we’ve lived, it’s difficult to be impressed by much, though.  I suppose Road and I forget the impression it makes.”  Wisely mused, following Allen’s gaze to the _Torre_. 

“It’s not bad.  Nicer than I expected from any family that counts Mikk as a member, certainly.”  Allen laughed, shaking off the strange sense of seeing the city again. 

“Tyki’s situation is…somewhat unusual.”  Wisely began, only to be cut off by Sheril cheerily scooping both of his ‘children’ into a hug and exclaiming at how cute Road looked today.  Wisely smirked from within the embrace as Allen jumped backwards, skin crawling from Sheril’s proximity, not to mention the deeply threatening air that had suddenly developed.

 

Once, Cross had taken them across the ocean to escape some particularly ferocious creditors.  At one point, they’d been in the far North, travelling on foot when Cross had frozen in the middle of the path.  Allen, unaware, had continued forward to take a closer look at the baby bear cub in front of them – the first bear he’d ever seen, outside of paintings.  As soon as he got close enough to the cub to take a good look at it, he’d heard a noise like a trombone blast that seemed to resonate through his very bones.  He’d barely gotten a look at the mother’s eyes before she hit him, just after he’d activated his innocence and Cross had quit laughing like an idiot and actually bothered to save him.  That brief moment when he’d locked eyes with the mother was suddenly called back in perfect relief when he made eye contact with Sheril. 

 

Allen kept his face still, even if his legs and arms tensed reflexively.

“What do we have here, my sweet and perfect daughter?”  Sheril asked, voice molasses-sweet.

“Wisely invited Allen to dinner!  Since he’s living with us now, it’s fine, isn’t it…daddy?”  Road asked, sending Sheril what Allen immediately recognised as textbook-perfect puppy eyes.  Sheril all but melted.

“Well, of course it’s fine if that’s what you want, darling!”  He purred. 

 

_“This is gonna be fucking weird.” Neah observed._

Allen didn’t particularly enjoy agreeing with Neah, but on this occasion…well.  

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, noticed a disturbing absence of Allen/Noah Clan fic on here and decided to be part of the solution! That aside, I love and feed off of reviews so hmu and any typos please let me know! Thanks,  
> -Hydrabells <3
> 
> ALSO, I'm on tumblr at hydra-bells.tumblr.com!


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